I work with male founders who are making money but quietly losing themselves at home, 

Drinking more than they want to admit.

Health sliding.

Head constantly running worst case scenarios about cashflow, performance, and keeping everything afloat.

One client closed a £700k deal in Q3 2025. 

He went home buzzing.

His wife looked at him and said,

“Our daughter asked me today if you even like her.”

He had spent three months chasing deals.

Late nights.

Trains to London.

Eight days at home in total.

That is not rare.

That is normal in founder life.

Here is what most men miss.

You will spend hours preparing for a meeting but you won’t spend three minutes asking your kid about their day.

You track revenue daily like a crazed addict yet you can’t remember the last time you sat down as a family to eat dinner together. 

Then you wonder why success feels flat.

He asked me,

“Is it possible to feel proud at home the way I do at work?”

Of course it is. 

You don’t lack the skills to get shit done. You have a plan, set goals and then execute. 

They just point them in one direction and aren’t extended to your loved ones. 

We turned that around and family time went in the diary as a non negotiable. 

He took a break from alcohol and introduced some healthy habits. We unpacked his fear that were holding him back from being the best version of himself. 

Three months later his daughter ran to the door when he got home.

He felt the same buzz watching her score at football as he did closing a deal.

That is the work.

Helping founders apply world class thinking to their body, their relationships, and the life they are actually living.

Build the business.

Keep the family.

Walk into your house calm.

Not carrying the company on your back.

That is what I do.

If you want my help, message me with the word “Ready”.

Adam Smith

5 years ago I quit drinking alcohol, 


I wasn’t an alcoholic, it just wasn’t serving me anymore.   

In the last 5 years I’ve;

-Set up my own company 
-Coached over 500 people 
-Turned over multiple 6 figures YOY 
-Have a car through my company 
-Sold out 5 men’s retreats 
-Got in the best shape of my life 
-In the healthiest financial position I’ve ever been 
-In a thriving relationship 
-Set up a podcast with over 130 episodes 
-Been featured in a book 
-Got my social media following to over 50,000


And much more. 

Would this have happened without taking a break from alcohol all then years ago? No. 

Is my life infinitely better for having removed it? Yes. 

I am yet to meet a single person that regrets removing alcohol. 

If you want my help, I’m only a message away. 

Are you alcohol? How did your life change? Comment below

Life Coaching For Male Founders who want to remove alcohol, rebuild their health, and stop letting fear about money, performance, and failure follow them home every night.

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I last drank alcohol 2,000 days ago,


I wasn’t an alcoholic, it just wasn’t serving me anymore. 

It’s the last thing most people will want to remove from their lives. 

You’ll look at cold plunges, meditation apps, join Hyrox etc but I’m telling you right now, the best performance hack in the world is actually removing alcohol. 

Sobriety gives you more clarity and energy. 

This leads to better decisions, improved sleep and more time. 

From there you’ll start to eat healthier, drink more water and get outside more. 

Your training goes to the next level and you’re so much more consistent. 

Weight starts to come off and you feel more confident. 

Your clothes fit better and you are more comfortable being naked with your partner. 

Your sex life improves and you feel more connected. 

Your stress starts to decrease and you get more shit done at work.

This means you can put the laptop down when you get home and actually be more present with your kids. 

These aren’t some fabricated results or outcomes. I’ve seen this happen with hundreds of my clients. 

For me personally; 

-Lost 30kg of fat 
-Left my old job
-Started my own business
-Coached over 500 people 
-Scaled to multiple 6 figures 
-12% body fat and in the best shape of my life. 
-Reduced anxiety and depression 
-Sleep better than ever 
-Saved thousands of pounds 

The only reason you’re resistant is because it goes against something you’ve done for decades which I completely understand. 

If you’re sober curious, just take a 30 day break and you can see all the benefits for yourself.

Alcohol is the problem, not the solution. 

A lot of people turn to alcohol after a hard day to “unwind” or “destress”.   

The harsh reality is, it does neither of these things. 

Even if you're only drinking 1-2 beers a week, it destroys your sleep and recovery the next day and negatively impacts your performance. 

Repeat that each week and you’ve got 52 days a year where you’re underperforming. 

If you don’t care about that, then fine. 

I only coach people that do and want to get better. 

I cover this and much more in this week's newsletter.

The real reason your energy is all over the place Most men do not think their energy problem is an alcohol problem. They assume it is work, stress, re

Open article: Alcohol doesn't cure stress, it causes it.  by Adam Smith • 3 min read

Alcohol doesn't cure stress, it causes it.

My former client recently celebrated 4 years without alcohol, 

Rich Casement came to us like most men do. 

The great career, the house, the car, the lovely family and a feeling of, is this it? 

Sobriety gives you a level of clarity that is completely unmatched. 

It’s the silver bullet you’re searching for when it comes to transforming your life. 
In that time he’s;

-Lost over 25lbs of fat 
-Left his corporate job 
-Ran multiple marathons 
-More present at home 
-Calmer with his kids 
-Set up his own business 
-Is part of our team as contractor 
-Overcome limiting beliefs that held him back

And so much more. 

Here’s what he had to say; 

“Four years ago today, I made a decision that totally changed the direction and trajectory of my life - I removed alcohol.

Truth be told, removing the booze wasn’t the hard bit, I was ready for that. Unpicking the identity I’d built round it was a more complicated process, and is still ongoing somewhat to this day.

A few weeks later, I started working Smith & Mayhew, and this was the start of real transformation.

Grateful to you both for the support, guidance and friendship you’ve given along the way” 


Thats the beauty of our coaching, it continues to change your life long after the program ends. 

If you’re sick of feeling like shit and want to make changes, come join our free workshop next Wednesday the 14th of Jan at 7pm UK time. Using this link https://lnkd.in/ebue6uMi

P.s. Are you alcohol free? Comment below

6 years ago I was forced out of a job I hated. It would be the best thing that ever happened to me,


I was told my face didn’t fit their “culture”.

That company was about as cultured as an orgy in an Aldi car park. 

It forced my hand to pivot away from a career I had become disillusioned with. 

I started my own coaching company with my best mate Adam Mayhew 

Yesterday we celebrated 5 years of being in business together as we hosted a boardroom event for some of our clients.  

(We have clients in UK, USA, Canada, Singapore and AUS so it’s not possible to get them altogether in one room. 🤣)

That said it was such a powerful day for the attendees and us as well. 

We talked about how to overcome fear, set life changing goals, rewire your negative thoughts and breathwork. 

Had I not been let go from that job I hated yesterday wouldn’t have happened. 

We wouldn’t have coached over 500 people.

Our podcast wouldn’t exist. 

We wouldn’t have created a life we didn’t want to escape from. 

I think about that everyday. 

Being surrounded by like minded people that all want to grow and make lasting change was so inspiring. 

Our core offering with our coaching has been centred around being online to reach as many people as we can. 

We’re changing that. The world is drowning in AI and disconnection right now so the only solution we see is to have more in person events as part of our new offer. 

There’s not going to be anything like this in the UK and we can’t wait to launch it. 

More on that later. 

For now, I’m going to be reflecting on what an incredible day we had with some truly amazing people. 

When you get cast aside, remember that it might not be rejection, it could be redirection. 

LFG.

Every LinkedIn BINfluencers millionaire morning routine, 


Melt 3 pages of atomic habits and inject them into your genitals. 

Sniff lavender infused sticks to fight against gut bacteria and your deepest childhood trauma. 

Drink a concoction of kale infused creatine and butter beans to deeply trouble your anus. 

Fight a bear. 

Text all of your ex lovers and see if they’re up for an orgy just to strengthen your ability to handle to rejection. 

Say absolute non sensical tripe on a podcast and make sure you look like a Temu Chris Williamson. 

If you don’t, you’ll never make 10k months and if you don’t do that, you’re a wet quilt that doesn’t deserve love. 

Agree? Agree? Will you f*cking validate me and say AGREE?!! 

P.s. If you want my made up guide that does absolutely jack shit for your own benefit and is only used as a call to action to sell the dream to desperate people, comment HELMET and I won’t do anything about it. 

AGREE?

My business partner and I often have a bath together, 


Not really, it’s a hot tub at one of our retreats but it does get weird when the bubbles stop. 

Anyway….

Tonight we’re hosting a free workshop that is going to be an absolute game changer for you in 2026. 

It’s centred around all things habit building, goal setting and overcoming the limitations. 

You’ll leave feeling refreshed, energised and with a clear plan on your next big move. 

We’ve coached over 500 people in the last 5 years and have compiled our most life changing models into a 90 minute session. 

Who’s this for? Anyone that wants to grow and is sick of playing small. 

Link is in the comments.

25 days into dry January and just look at my transformation.

2,000 days ago I removed alcohol from my life, 


I never liked alcohol. From the moment I first indulged in 6 pints at the age of 15 and decorated the streets of Spain with my vomit, I knew it wasn’t for me. 

That awful feeling of being out of control and vulnerable never left me. 

So why did I do it for another 16 years? 

Because everybody else did. It was the done thing. 

14-16 you drink in parks or at house parties. 

16-18 you go out with mates to the local pubs. 

18-21 you drink anything in liquid form. 

21-25 it’s just part of your life now. 

25-30 life starts to get a bit more serious. You start progressing in your career, you might look to buy a house and the booze is now used a bit of a coping strategy.

30+ the hangovers are becoming unbearable and you’re almost relying on alcohol to help “unwind” or “destress” or become “fun”. 

I just realised that alcohol wasn’t serving me anymore and being in lockdown meant that I no longer needed to wear a mask. 

The mask that I attached an identity to and hoped that people would like me. 

The one that goes out every week and tries to be validated by women and have no real depth to my conversations with my mates.

The one that secretly hated himself and what he had become. 

The day after my partners birthday I decided enough was enough. 

I took a 30 day break. I needed it.

My face looked like a burst couch. 

I was fat, miserable and had no direction. 

In that 30 days I started to gain so much clarity and energy. 

I began eating better, my sleep improved and I started doing home workouts. 

The weight began to fall off me. My clothes fit better, I wasn’t repulsed by my own reflection and I began to have more respect for myself. 

I became more productive and focused than ever and my anxiety almost disappeared. 

It’s not all plain sailing and the highs wear off but I am yet to meet anyone that has removed alcohol and regretted it. 

No one has ever said, “you know what Adam, I want to go back to feeling like shit”

Funny that. 

So if you’re reading this right now and wishing you could stop drinking, trust me when I say, if I can do, so can you.

Are you alcohol free? Comment below

There’s one book I recommend to all of my clients,


“The Courage To Be Disliked”. 

So many of people are walking around and apologising for existing.

Does any of this sound familiar? 

You rush like a starved squirrel when you’re getting your bags down from the overhead locker on a plane in the fear someone may be irritated. 

You don’t fill your water bottle up to the top at the fountain at the gym because someone behind you is huffing and puffing. 

Someone walks into you and you apologise for it. 

You say yes to things you hate because you’re afraid of saying no and then you lose respect for yourself. 

You lie about why you can’t go to the Dog and Dickhead with Dodgy Dave because he might take the piss out of you for doing dry January. 

The thing is, whether someone likes you or not isn’t your task. 

Whether your child eats too much junk food isn’t your task. They will realise eventually. 

If your partner doesn’t like the fact you’ve declined going to a wedding of someone she went to high school with 25 years ago isn’t your task. 

If someone honks their horn at you in traffic and becomes irate, it’s not your task to get out and join in. 

There are so many things out of our control and once we lean into that concept, it will change your life. 

Things that are your task;

-What you eat and drink each day 
-Whether you exercise that day 
-How you respond to things 
-Putting in firm boundaries 
-Sticking with your habits 
-What you say and how you say it

That’s about it. 

Trying to appease everyone means you please no one and I’m certain a lot of people will read this and disagree with it. 

That’s fine. 

I don’t care. 

The longest relationship you’ll ever have is with yourself. Make it a good one. 

P.s. If you want to consume more of my content, go listen to my podcast using this link. https://lnkd.in/gksK4d23

The coaching industry is fuck3d, 


The barrier to entry has never been lower. 

You have people doing courses that cost £97 to sit on a zoom call for 3 hours with some douchebag from Bali and now you’re suddenly qualified to become a coach 🤦‍♂️

Not only is this unethical it can be dangerous. 

In a world where AI is going to dominate and blur the lines between what is real and what isn’t, the cream will rise to the top. 

So if you’re wanting to work with a team of experts that has coached over 500 people in the last 5 years.

A team that has worked with leaders from Amazon, Dell and Team GB. 

A team that has coached pro footballers and celebrities. 

A team that cares deeply about your results and will provide round the clock accountability and support. 

A team that help you in building healthy habits, removing alcohol, overcoming limiting beliefs, becoming present at home, getting shit done, being fulfilled and much more, let’s talk. 

Or go spend a few hundred quid on a coach that has to google what imposter syndrome is mid call.

P.s. We’re hosting a free workshop on the 20th of January at 7pm UK time. The session is designed to set you up for success in 2026 and remove the limitations holding you back.

This is the link https://lnkd.in/ebue6uMi

“Will you stop banging on about being alcohol free, it’s so boring”. 
Me:

Here’s 1 years worth of coaching in a single post,


-If they wanted to, they would have done. The more you chase people or try and change them, the more pain you cause yourself. 

-It’s not your fault that your parents weren’t as loving as they could have been, but it’s your responsibility to reframe this and make the necessary change. 

-If you don’t put in boundaries, other people will put them in for you. 

-You are teaching people how to treat you everyday. 

-You are not your thoughts. Your brain is wired to search for negativity and “safety”. Allow the thoughts to be there without judgment.

-Emotional intelligence is not pretending you’re not upset/angry/depressed. It’s defined by your ability to feel the emotion without judgment and then processing it in a healthy way. 

-You are exactly where you are due to the choices you’ve made. Dont look at it for worse than it is, look at it for what it is. Your current situation might not be ideal but it doesn’t mean you can’t change it. 

-You are capable of so much more and you’re holding yourself back through fear of failure and being judged. 

-The reason you “never finish anything” is down to the fact you’re trying to rush it and relying on when you’re motivated. Give yourself some time to change. 

-You don’t have imposter syndrome. You have low self esteem. There’s a big difference and this needs expert support. 

These are just some of the challenges I see day to day with my clients. 

Which one resonated with you? Comment below 

P.s. We’re hosting a free workshop tonight at 7pm UK time on all things habits, goal setting and how to get out of your own way. Link in the comments

A client lied right to face, 


He once told me he was pushing himself so hard because he wanted to “give his family the best life possible.”
 He genuinely believed it.

Then he came home after being away for a week with work and his wife said their son had asked why he never talks to him anymore.
 The kid thought his own dad didn’t like him.

He told me the buzz from that deal disappeared instantly.

Here’s the reality most business owners avoid:
A lot of the overworking isn’t about being a great provider at all.
 It’s insecurity dressed up as responsibility.
 Work becomes the safe place where you know what you’re doing, and home becomes the place you quietly hope sorts itself out.

At work you feel competent. 

At home you’re not sure what’s expected, so you stay in the environment where you feel in control and call it “sacrifice.”

He eventually admitted he was hiding behind the idea of “doing it all for them,” when really he was doing it because it was the only area of his life where he felt confident.

So we stripped it back and made his personal life something he intentionally worked on.

He started being present. 

He communicated with his wife properly. 

He spent genuine time with his son rather than squeezing him into the gaps of his week. 

Nothing dramatic, nothing Hollywood, just consistent effort in the right direction.

Six months later his son sprints to the door when he gets home. 

He told me that watching his boy score at the weekend felt better than closing that contract. 

He laughed and said, “Turns out I wasn’t a bad dad, I was just never there.”

This is the part no one wants to admit:
Most men aren’t “doing it for the family.”
 They’re doing it because they don’t know who they are without work propping them up.

You can grow a successful business and still be the kind of father and partner your family actually wants around.
 But you won’t do it while hiding behind the old story.

If you want clarity, structure and someone who will hold you to the standard you keep avoiding, message me with “Ready.”

How do you put in boundaries between work and home life? Comment below

This is by far the biggest issue I see with newly qualified coaches, 


They don’t invest in themselves. 

They leave a job they hate. Usually after realising it no longer serves them. 

That clarity often comes off the back of a personal transformation they have done themselves.

“I’ve gone sober so I’ll help others do the same”

“I lost weight so now I want to coach other people and help them”

Admirable? Sure. 

But there are so many things they don’t consider. 

I’ve had around 50 people message me over the years asking for free advice or to “pick my brain”. 

When I tell them my services and knowledge cost money they run a mile. 

“I can’t afford to invest any money right now”

These people will either end up broke or back in employment. 

Imagine starting a plumbing business with no van or tools. 

See how long your new barber shop lasts with no chair, scissors or products.

“Online is different though”

Ok cool. 

So tell me how you’re getting on with the following; 

-Domain name 
-Registering the business 
-Insurance 
-Bank account 
-Terms and conditions 
-Company email address 
-Website or landing page 
-Knowing your ideal client
-How to write copy that converts 
-Which social media platform to use 
-Why should prospects choose you? 
-Do you have a lead magnet to attract new clients? 
-Do you know what a lead magnet is? 
-What is involved in your programme?
-How long does it last?  
-How much do you charge? 
-How do you sell to them?
-How do you conduct your sessions?
-How do people pay?
-What happens when they finish their sessions? 
-When you start getting clients, how do you find time to run the business? 

Having a zoom account and a LinkedIn profile don’t make a business. You’re living in a fantasy world. 

We’re in a day and age where people flick through instagram and see some Binfluencer spouting absolute waffle about how you can make 10k a month (this would put you in the top 3% of earners in the UK by the way) 

“So should people not become a coach then?”

That’s not the point. 

Here’s what you need to do. 

✅Check your finances and until you have a 6-9 month run rate, don’t get started. 

✅Coach people for free first to see if you actually like it. Get testimonials from them.

✅Get qualified in a certain discipline and do your research on the company. 

✅Once qualified, hire someone that is 2-3 steps ahead of you. (Again, do your research)

✅Message everyone you know in your black book and tell them about your new business. 

✅Ask for any intro’s or referrals that you can

Even then your chances of lasting beyond year 5 is about 20% if you’re lucky. 

So while I don’t want to piss on anyone’s chips I also want to give as many people a wake up a call as I can. 

If you are a coach in the Life coaching, positive psychology, personal training, sobriety or nutrition space and want to book a call with me to see if I can help you, drop me a message.

Your energy isn’t broken.
You’re not “just getting older”.
You’re not lacking discipline or motivation.

Your energy is fucked because you’re drinking alcohol.

Most people don’t want to admit that the thing they use to unwind, cope or “take the edge off” is the very thing draining their performance. 

One drink wrecks your sleep. 

Poor sleep wrecks your focus. 

Low focus wrecks your decisions. 

Bad decisions wreck your standards and the cycle continues until you’re running your life on fumes and calling it normal.

In this live, I’m breaking down exactly why alcohol destroys your energy, your clarity and your emotional bandwidth, even if you think you “don’t drink that much”. 

We’ll dig into why weekends keep derailing your week, why your patience disappears, why your mood flatlines and why you feel like you’re operating at 60 percent of who you know you could be.

If you’ve been telling yourself you want more energy, more presence, more drive and more control in 2026, this live will give you the uncomfortable truth you’ve been avoiding.

Can you drink alcohol and be successful?

“Adam, what is wrong with a few beers every now and again?”

Well, it depends on what your goal is.

Not everybody wants to be optimal in every single area of their life, and that is fine.

But can you perform at your best while drinking alcohol?

No.

Can you achieve financial success, be fit and healthy, and have a solid relationship while drinking alcohol?

Of course.

Could it be even better if you removed it?

Absolutely.

Most people resist doing this. Why?

Because it is what you have always done. And I completely understand that.

If you have not abstained for longer than 30 days, you simply will not know how good you can feel when you pair it with other healthy habits.

I have been alcohol free for over five years now, and I have coached hundreds of people to remove alcohol from their lives. The only thing they all have in common is that they wish they had done it sooner.

No one has ever told me they want to go back to feeling like shit again.

Once you remove it, you get clarity you did not think was possible.

You start to have more energy. You help out around the house more. You want to play with your children.

You become more aware of your behaviour. You want to put your laptop away when you get home.

And the reason you keep your laptop out is fear.

Fear of not being good enough. Fear of not doing enough. Fear that the business will crumble if you stop working for two hours.

So you get yourself worked up.

Now you need a drink to unwind.

In reality, alcohol does not reduce stress.

It causes it.

It makes everything worse.

I could not give a hairy shit if you drink or not. It makes no difference to my day.

But I am telling you right now, if you took a break from it, it would change your life.

And your family’s.

Are you alcohol free?

Let me know below

Alcohol ruined my life



🍕 Frequently getting takeaways 
🍺 Drinking excessive amounts to “take the edge off” 
❌Not going to the gym again down to “needed rest”. 
📺 Watching an 8th episode on Netflix then complaining about having no time. 
📱Playing on your phone while eating dinner with your partner 
👨 Hanging out with the wrong people for your ambition levels. 

I got sick of feeling like shit and knew something needed to change. 

So I took a break from alcohol, that break has lasted over 5 years! I will never go back. 

My life is very different now. 

✅Eat a balanced sustainable diet
✅Go to the gym, play tennis or go for a walk everyday. 
✅Have boundaries with my work and more present with my partner  
✅Take days off for myself and do things I enjoy
✅Lose the judgement about taking rest when needed
✅Meditate and journal rather than scroll endlessly on social media 
✅Drink plenty of water each day 
✅Spend time with like minded people 

Letting yourself off the hook everyday isnt self love, it’s a form of self loathing in the long run and isn’t going to help you. 

If you want to beat the booze, get your life back and become the man you know you are deep down, drop me a message. 

 What are your thoughts on this? 

Comment below

Fellow founders. You’ve been fed a lie when it comes to success, 


Just a few snippets that I’ve seen in the last week. 

“You have to hit 10k months or you’re not working hard enough”. 

Why 10k? Also, if you’re hitting 10k months you’re in the top 5-10% of earners in the UK!

“Six figures is the minimum you should be earning” 

Why? Who decided this is the bench mark? 

“You don’t own a business, you own a job”

And? What if you really enjoy it? Also, it still means you can go on holiday when you want. Book a dentists appointment without having to ask permission and also pick your kids up from school.

I’m not anti ambition. I have some huge goals that I want to achieve. I just wish more people would build a business for their needs, not due to societal metrics of “should”.

If you’re a business owner and you like your work, you get to provide for yourself and your family with some spare money for a holiday, you’re smashing it. 

Don’t let some gimp on Instagram tell you any differently. 

What does success look like to you? 

Comment below

Amazon + Microsoft recognized leader | Proven coaching programs to help you land a job you love

You’ve worked too hard to feel this stuck.

You’ve led high-stakes projects, delivered results that mattered, and climbed further than most ever will.
But somewhere along the way, the work stopped feeling like it fit.

Maybe the role’s too small now.
Maybe the company’s changed.
Maybe you have.

I know what that moment feels like — because I’ve lived it.

The first time I left a “perfect” job, it made no sense to anyone but me.

On paper, I’d made it.
I was at Amazon, leading product marketing for high-profile products like Prime and Fire tablets.

I’d started in academia and retail, then landed at Microsoft in a role that valued my retail background (who knew?). That move brought me from D.C. to Seattle.

Just as I’d settled in, Amazon came knocking — asking me to get offline retailers ready for the Fire Phone launch. That move took my Big Tech career to a whole new level.

But I couldn’t shake the feeling something didn’t fit.
The work moved faster, the bar kept shifting higher — but my sense of purpose was shrinking.

When I looked around, I saw smart, capable colleagues stay in roles they no longer loved because the comp or title looked good. I realised I was on the same path — and I didn’t want to be.

So I walked away and rebuilt my career on different terms.
Ones that gave me impact and energy.
Ones that felt tangible, sustainable, and worth showing up for.

That change in focus led me to coaching.

Now, I help experienced Big Tech professionals navigate bold career moves — especially when they want their next step to look nothing like their last.

How we work together:
🧭 Clarity – Define your values, strengths, and direction
🎯 Job Search – Own your story and land roles you actually want
🚀 First 90 Days – Lead with purpose from day one in your new role

Results my clients see:
✅ Leadership roles at companies they believe in
✅ Bigger comp and better alignment
✅ Confidence in interviews, negotiations, and decisions
✅ A definition of success that fits their life

Because you’re too smart to waste your best years in the wrong role.
Especially when the next chapter can be the best one yet.

Want to know how coaching can accelerate your career? 
📅 Book your 20-minute clarity call:
https://calendly.com/mfdcoaching/clarity

Mel Fox Dhar

The most wasted moment in a senior interview?
When they ask: “Do you have any questions for us?”

By that point, they already know you can do the job.

What they’re listening for is how you think, what you value, and whether you’ll be someone they want to work with.

Skip the throwaways.

Ask questions that tell you something real and make them think, “This person gets it.”

Three questions I see clients using very effectively in their interviews:
1️⃣ Decision-making → “When leadership is split on a big call, how do you get to a decision?”

2️⃣ Culture → “Tell me about someone who is successful here. What makes them effective?”

3️⃣ Team dynamics → “When priorities change fast, how do you decide what drops and what gets done?”

These aren’t just for showing you've been paying attention, they’re you're opportunity to seal the deal and see if you can thrive there. 

What’s the best end-of-interview question you’ve asked, or been asked?

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P.S. Last week’s newsletter broke down exactly how to set up an Impact Bank. If you want the template, you can grab it here: 
https://www.melfoxdhar.com/post/10-by-january-no-one-will-remember-what-you-did-this-fall

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My background is in {{relevant domain / scope}}. Most recently, I’ve been focused on {{1–2 outcomes that map cleanly to the role}}. From the job description, this role appears closely aligned with the kind of work I’ve been doing, particularly {{specific problem or mandate from the spec}}.
Sharing context in case it’s helpful as you’re reviewing candidates.
Best,
{{Your name}}

melfoxdharcoaching

Land & Thrive in a Role You Love | Career Coach for Big Tech | 10 Years at Amazon + Microsoft

5 fails in transitioning to your first role post-Amazon 
 
1️⃣ Start working immediately. Downtime is for losers. A weekend totally counts. 
 
2️⃣ Don't observe the culture. They want you to bring all that Amazon intensity with you. 
 
3️⃣ Tell people everything they know is wrong by saying "This is how we did it at Amazon." 
 
4️⃣ Expect instant trust. Because "I worked at Amazon." 
 
5️⃣ Get frustrated by the impact you're having in your first 30 days, flip back on your 'looking for work' flag and start stalking your old team for new roles. 
 
What would you add? 
 
 
#bigtech #bestcareeradvice #coaching #newjob 
--- 
 
P.S. Want help hitting the ground running in your next role? Reach out. 
Together we'll make a plan and help you transition successfully into that dream job you worked so hard to land.

I’ve coached a lot of people through Big Tech layoffs, and there’s a pattern I see on repeat: 
Most people try to move really fast and land something immediately. 

One of my recent clients was laid off from Microsoft and did exactly that.
She dove straight into job searching.
And it was making her miserable.

So we paused.
Not 12-week yoga retreat in Bali "find yourself" slow down. 
Just long enough to get honest about what she actually wanted next.
And what came out surprised her.

She hated product marketing.
Hated it.
What she really wanted was to go back into sales - specifically sales enablement.
Once she named that, things shifted.
We aligned her profile to where she actually wanted to go.
She changed how she was showing up - not by erasing her product marketing background, but by positioning it as helpful.

Her experience as a Product Marketer became evidence of:
- how she enabled sellers
- how she translated product strategy into customer-facing stories
- how she supported revenue teams in practice, not theory

Her story tightened.
Her interviews felt more grounded.

She wasn't making anything up or trying to convince someone - she was framing her experience in ways that made sense for her new role. 

She landed a new role back in September.
End to end, her search took about six weeks.

Because clarity removes friction.

"Mel, why would you become a coach? You have real, marketable skills." 
 
I still chuckle recalling that conversation. At the time, it felt like a gut punch.
 
Back then, I hadn't started coaching school nor left Amazon. I was just sharing my plan with a friend. Her surprise was genuine - she couldn't understand why I'd trade a stable career to start my own journey.
 
No one would blame me for backing down. For deciding to keep coaching as a side-hustle; I'd been doing that for a year, why not a bit longer? 
 
But instead, I took a deep breath and explained that 
I was ridiculously excited to help people stop betraying themselves in the name of success and start making intentional decisions about their careers. 
 
Too many talented individuals find themselves stuck, unsure of their next move and don't know how to make the ideas in their head a reality. 
And that's a damn shame. 
 
She agreed
and the rest, as they say, is history. 
 

Here's what I now know to be true - 
The biggest risk wasn't quitting corporate and starting my own business. 
It was letting someone else's opinion drive what I thought I could do. 
 
Yet, we all do this. 
When we're afraid of taking or even exploring a next step 
because of what other people will think. 
 
And yet 
a brief chat with someone living our dream can illuminate our path and give us the insight we need to know if it's worth considering further. 
I know that's where I started. 

So... 
Isn't it time to take that step?
Who could you speak to that's doing what you dream of?

My heart goes out to everybody impacted by layoffs yesterday. 

It's never easy. 
And I'm sure there are plenty of people telling themselves some version of 
"I should have seen it coming."
👆Not helpful, to say the least.

I pretty consistently see - with clients and friends alike - that when layoffs come, those that rise from the ashes are the ones that take it as an opportunity to reflect on what they want next and move forward with intention. 

It is with that in mind that I would encourage you to do the same.

It's never going to be something you take in stride, 
even if you had gotten used to the idea it might happen and you didn't really like your job anyway. 

Allowing yourself a little bit of time to grieve and process is a good thing. 
You're giving yourself the opportunity to step back and think about what you actually want to have happen next.

- What's the right move that's going to bring your career and your life into alignment?
- What's the right salary that's going to reflect what you need?
- What are the right problems to be solved and domains to focus on that are going to leave you feeling energized at work?

But first, perhaps you take a beat enjoy coming out of the pressure cooker.

If I can lend some perspective or point you to a resource, give me a shout. 

Take care. 
MFD

You’re in a new role and suddenly thinking:
"Why is everyone suddenly all up in my sh*t?"

You’re not junior.
You’re not new to leadership.

And yet... every decision is being questioned, reviewed, or revisited.
This shows up a lot for my leaders leaving Amazon, especially during their first 90 days in the new role. 

Here’s what’s usually gone wrong:
𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗺𝗮𝗻𝗮𝗴𝗲𝗿 𝗱𝗼𝗲𝘀𝗻’𝘁 𝘆𝗲𝘁 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝗼 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗷𝘂𝗱𝗴𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁.

At Amazon, autonomy is assumed... called 'being scrappy'
and through docs, people come to trust how you think.

In a new company, that trust hasn’t been built yet - and the signals are different.

So what feels like micromanagement is often uncertainty.

Not about your capability.
About how you make decisions.

The two common mismatches likely to cause the most the most drama: 
• You lead with outcomes. Your manager wants to see the reasoning.
• You work through nuance. Your manager just wants the call.

Same problem. Different flavour.

Here’s how to fix it.
👉 Make your thinking legible. On purpose.

If you default to leading with the big picture: 
- Share your plan, tradeoffs, and next steps before you’re asked.
- Don’t assume results alone will buy trust this early.

If you default to diving into the details: 
- Set the stage by leading with the decision and the implication.
- Treat depth as support, not the headline.

This is how senior leaders earn the trust needed to have autonomy in a new system.
If everyone feels “in your business” right now, pause before getting frustrated.

You probably don’t have a micromanagement problem.
You have a translation problem.
And those are very fixable.

You don't have two brains

You don’t get a work brain and a life brain.
You get one.

I spent years trying to be two people — the version of me at work who could run launches, make hard calls, keep things moving, and the version of me outside work who was somehow supposed to recover from all of that and still feel like herself.

That split sounds reasonable.

It didn’t work.

When the decisions you’re making at work don’t line up with the life you’re trying to live, the friction shows up fast - burnout, numbness, or that constant sense that you’re forcing it.

Alignment isn’t about making work more tolerable.

It’s about being honest about the life you want - and letting work support that, not compete with it.

This wasn’t a theoretical insight for me. It came from being in roles that looked great on paper and slowly realizing they no longer fit.

If this resonates - check out this conversation I had with Candice Mitchell (MSc) in the full episode of Development Nerds.

Watch it here: https://lnkd.in/ezdYZ3zg
Give it a listen, here: https://lnkd.in/eMkDKyc9

Every time I suggest someone look at their LinkedIn skills, they think I’ve lost the plot.

“I’m not junior.”
“My experience is clear.”
“That section can’t be the issue.”

But if the 𝗶𝗻𝗽𝘂𝘁𝘀 are wrong, the 𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗽𝘂𝘁𝘀 will be too.

A client recently came to me frustrated that all his LinkedIn outreach was for roles far below his level.

Nothing matched where he was actually trying to go.

His experience wasn’t the problem.
His profile inputs were.

He hadn’t updated his skills in years.

Recruiters don’t start by reading profiles.
They start by running searches.

Those searches rely heavily on titles and skills.

Here’s what his skills section was feeding into the system:
- Microsoft Excel
- SQL
- JIRA
- Requirements Analysis
- Reporting & Analysis

None of these are bad.
But together, they describe 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸 𝗴𝗲𝘁𝘀 𝗱𝗼𝗻𝗲, not 𝘄𝗵𝗼 𝗼𝘄𝗻𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸.

So when searches were run for Director+ profiles, the outcome was predictable:

he didn’t appear, or
he appeared in searches below his actual level

We changed the inputs.

Updated skills (all real LinkedIn skills):
- Strategic Planning
- Business Strategy
- Portfolio Management
- Decision-Making
- Change Management
= Organizational Leadership

Same experience.
Different results.

This is the part people miss:

Your skills section isn’t an inventory.
It’s a filtering mechanism.

If your skills skew toward execution, the roles surfaced to you will too.

So if the outreach you’re getting feels misaligned or down-leveled, don’t assume the market is broken.

Check the inputs you’re providing.

P.S. I get that this is a decidedly unsexy part on how to improve your profile, but it's table stakes. If you want to know the ins and outs of how to make your profile work for you - join my Recruiter-Magnet LinkedIn Profile masterclass on January 28 at 9am PT/5pm GMT. 

https://lnkd.in/eesUgS2F

Sharing a quick win from this week.

On Wednesday, I ran my Recruiter-Magnet LinkedIn Profile workshop.

Three people made small but specific updates — and got recruiter outreach the same day.

Not just any outreach.
Aligned roles. Correct level.

A few things this reinforces (again):

– Recruiters aren’t browsing profiles. They’re searching. If your headline + skills don’t match how they query, you won't show up. 
– Senior profiles often get this wrong by sounding impressive instead of searchable. 
– Recruiter activity is up, but search behaviour hasn’t changed.

Also: they didn’t spend hours optimising.
They made their titles and skills line up with the *roles they actually want*.

Remember 2022?

When recruiters were in your DMs like:
“Heyyy, want to 2x your salary and work from a beach?” 🏝️

Yeah. Same.

Now?
The market is stacked with smart, capable people — many of whom are still waiting for the system to magically sort things out.

(It won’t.)

The difference right now isn’t talent.
It’s clarity.
The people getting traction aren’t “better.”

They’re easier to understand:
Why this role
Why them
Why now

That’s exactly what we’ll cover in my workshop on Wednesday, January 28 how to get noticed (and actually move things forward) when being great isn’t enough on its own anymore.

If you know what you want but feel weirdly stuck on how to get there, come hang out.

It’s a new game.
Once you see the rules, things get a lot less mysterious.

🔗 in 💬

“It’s manageable.”
“I’m not sure what I want next yet.”
“After the next launch, it’ll be clearer.”
“Once things stabilise, I’ll take a proper look.”

I hear this most often from senior folks at Amazon and Microsoft.
Not because they’re stuck -
but because they’re planning for a cleaner version of reality.

A version where the org is stable.
The market is predictable.
The signal is obvious.
And the next move presents itself neatly.
That version almost never arrives.

The two clients in today’s video?
We first spoke a year ago.
They were waiting for the conditions to make sense.
Instead, the conditions changed - and the questions stayed the same.

Senior careers don’t unlock in a perfect world.
They move forward in the one you’re actually in.

So the real question isn’t whether things will improve.
It’s whether you’re willing to make decisions without ideal conditions.

If this feels uncomfortably familiar, that’s usually the moment worth paying attention to.

Your resume is only as good as the story it tells about where you’re going.

I’m working with a client who’s had 8 roles in 10 years.
He’s worried he looks like a job hopper.
He’s not.

Each move was strategic - new scope, new problems, sharper skills.

The real issue? His story stopped at what he did instead of what it means.

As in - he didn't string it together so folks knew how he'd leverage this excellent skill set to solve problems for them. 

That’s the difference between a timeline and a narrative.

If you want the scoop on how to do this on your LinkedIn profile - join my Recruiter Magnet workshop tomorrow (Jan 28 at 9am PT/5pm GMT)

🔗 in the 💬

A pattern we keep seeing with senior Big Tech job searches right now:

Smart, capable leaders doing things that used to work 
- and wondering why progress feels slower than it should.

It’s not a capability problem.
It’s a strategy mismatch.

Common ones we see:
- Treating LinkedIn like a career timeline instead of a signal
- Waiting on recruiters or cold outreach to create momentum
- Interviewing to prove competence instead of senior judgment

None of this means you’re behind.
The market moved. Most people didn’t notice.

This is what prompted the workshop I’m co-hosting with Myra Deshmukh.

We’re breaking down three mistakes we see experienced Big Tech leaders make right now - why they quietly stall momentum, and what to do instead.

No hype. No fluff. No performative advice.
Just clearer signal, better judgment, and fewer blind spots. 

Details + registration below.

Caye Yang, Myra Deshmukh and 4 other attendees

View event: Demystifying Today's Job Market

"So much useful information was given in the hour session - every insight was invaluable! From headlines to resume visibility...and so much more, I'm looking forward to making some positive changes!" 

It's time to get that LinkedIn profile working for you. 
Join me January 28 - let's rock this together.

Is it time to overhaul that LinkedIn profile? Join my workshop today.

It is fast, practical, and very specific.

People who’ve attended say things like:
“Tangible actions and steps I could implement immediately.”
“Extremely actionable, without any fluff.”
“Well organised, fast paced, and actually useful.”
“Short, focused, and to the point.”

If you know what role you want next but haven’t cracked how to get recruiters to see it, this session is about:
what to change on your LinkedIn profile
why those changes work
and how to implement them without overthinking it

We’re kicking off today at 9am PT/5pm GMT. 

If you want clarity and momentum (not a pep talk), this is for you.
🔗 in 💬

taplio

The Battle

Adam Smith

Mel Fox Dhar

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taplio

The Battle

Adam Smith

Mel Fox Dhar

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Engagements

Likes

Performance Score.css-goub6s{font-size:var(--chakra-fontSizes-md);font-weight:500;color:var(--chakra-colors-gray-600);display:block;margin-top:var(--chakra-space-1);}Adam Smith's LinkedIn Performance

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Performance ScoreAdam Smith's LinkedIn Performance