Strengthening self-leadership for lasting high performance and a calmer life balance | Personal & professional growth | Great leadership begin from within | 25 years in Comms & Leadership

The women I work with are already successful.

Like yourself: competent, respected and trusted. You lead, deliver and are deeply committed to doing a good job - often without anyone needing to ask. 

But inside you often feel self-doubt and a sense of being out of sync with yourself.  

And, a growing sense that the way you’ve learned to succeed has come with a cost no one warned you about: 

More or less constant self-pressure, blurred boundaries and the feeling of always being “on.” 

So you keep going. 
Not because it works, but because it’s what you know.

Now imagine another way of leading yourself - one that’s grounded, sustainable and supports the life you want alongside your career.

That’s the work I do.

I help high-performing women strengthen self-leadership from the inside out — with boundaries, courage and practical tools — so you can lead yourself and your team without self-compromising. A way of working and living that both you and your well-being can stand behind.

Are you tired of feeling that you're giving everything, but has nothing left for yourself?

Are you ready to find another way to lead, work and live?

Then let's talk. 
DM me or send an email to annika.mohlin@growu.se

Or be the first to know about this:
https://annika-mohlin.systeme.io/programwaitlist


Based in Sweden. 
Working globally.
Languages: Swedish & English 🇸🇪 🇬🇧 

Annika Mohlin 🌱

This week 3 years ago I went back to work after my sick leave for exhaustion syndrome. 

Coming to terms with that word – and even worse: burnout – has been a journey for a high performer like me, with big ambitions in all areas of life. For a long time, I felt ashamed about it. 

Many of you know me as a happy, energetic and positive person. And I am.

But like everyone else, I have my dips. 
The autumn of 2022 was a deep one.

> I had worked far too much for too long.
> I was handling new demands and responsibilities without getting more resources for the team – sometimes not even a thank you.
> Life at home was intense: three active children, one was struggling a lot in high school and needed a lot of support.
> In the middle of all of this I lost my Dad.
 
What kept me going for as long as I did was that I prioritised the basics: sleep, food, exercise. And fantastic support from my husband. It was actually he who finally said: “Either you call your manager, or I will.”

The three months I spent at home made me rethink a lot of things. I reflected a lot, listened more carefully inwards and started making other choices. 

This is what helped me:
✅ Starting each day with breathing and practising taking control of my thoughts
✅ Reflecting and journaling about everyday happy moments
✅ Spending a lot of time outdoors, long walks by the sea
✅ Practicing setting boundaries with myself and others
✅ Being coached
✅ Exercising
And getting lots of love from family and friends ❤️ 
 
It can be hard to see the signs when things are becoming too much. I certainly didn’t.

So if you’re feeling low, easily irritated, unfocused or constantly on the run... please: slow down, check in with yourself and start putting yourself first a bit more. 

I was the last one to realise I had burned out.
Don’t be like me.

 📸 My ever loving support and I, on a shopping tour (can you see where?) with unconsciously colour coded outfits 😂

📧 If you like this kind of content, I have a newsletter too. Link to sign up in my profile.

Leadership that doesn’t cost you yourself | For women leaders done being the good girl | Authority without self-compromise | Popcorn Lover🍿| Waitlist is now OPEN👇🏼

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What a fr***in mess. I felt sooo stupid. 

Yesterday I ran my online workshop. Halfway through my screen froze and I got kicked out from my own meeting.

– Wow, you all look very focused, I said to the participants as they came back from setting their goals, and I felt so happy about the dedication I saw. 

Then I noticed: my screen had frozen completely. 
They couldn't hear me. 
I couldn't hear them. 

$hit. 

Luckily the meeting chat worked fine, so long story short I let everyone know I'd leave and rejoin the meeting, but it wouldn't let me leave so I tried leaving again but it wouldn't let me since it was just stuck, so I joined from my phone instead trying to keep up with what I was teaching while at the same time restarting my computer hoping it would let me back in. Which it did 🙏🏼

Phew. 
(if that felt chaotic to read, you've got a little hint of what I felt)

Participants were still around 💛
We went on from there. 
Everyone got their roadmaps for 2026✌🏼

I can't help but laugh at this. This is exactly the kind of mess you DON'T want “on stage” (or backstage, for that matter).

But this is leadership too. This is facilitation too – dancing in the moment, staying present when things wobble, bringing the process forward and trusting that “good enough” is enough. And if nothing else, it's a proof of being human.

Good thing tech support isn't part of my services 😬

Here's a question for you: 
What do you do when things don't go as planned?

3 years ago I sat in my car outside my office building, just as my doctor recommended.

“Just go there once before you start.
Don’t go in. Just look.”

So that’s what I did.
I sat there watching as a way of mentally preparing myself to go back to work after my burnout.

I remember it felt like returning with a version of myself I no longer fully trusted. Rough feeling to be with for sure. 

They say some things never quite go back to how they were after a burnout... I think they’re right (my husband agrees. He says there’s a 'before' and an 'after').

And yes, I sure miss some qualities I used to have.
At the same time, I’ve gained others.

I am grateful for the learnings, but hitting the wall like I did is nothing I recommend.

One of my biggest learnings is about setting – and keeping – clear boundaries. 

Not only with others.
But with yourself.

Knowing when to pause, rest and take care of yourself is a boundary in itself. 

Especially when the inner drive to push through and "just finish this little thing too" is hard to resist.

If this struck a chord, you might want to know that I’m running a small Boundary Bootcamp.

A 2-week challenge focused on building practical, sustainable boundary skills – for those who tend to give a little too much.

Read more on the link in my profile, or send me a DM.

I'm such a hypocrate.

Teaching balance and boundaries and last night I caught myself

> Watching Sweden shred Croatia in handball Euros
> Texting with my Mom
> Catching up on news reading Mark Carney’s speech

...all at the same time. Triple-tasking. Double-screening. 

And you know what else?

Some days I forget to pause. I lose track of time and just... keep going.

Which only makes me edgy and irritated. Far from my best self.

So how dare I talk about sustainable self-leadership, if I don’t even get my own basics right...?

Because I’m human.

Which means I don’t always get it right (who does?).

Here’s the difference from when my bad good girl ruled the show:

I don’t beat myself up about it.
I catch it, stop and return to what I know works.

Who said the coach can't make mistakes?

Slipping is normal.
Finding your way back is something you practice in small ways, every day.

Grateful for the reminder last night.
And for Sweden’s win!!

PS. Tournament is held in Malmö where I live. Anyone on site last night?

I've coached Comms Managers, CFO:s, Project Leaders, Marketing Managers. Over the years, one pattern keeps repeating:

They're exceptional at meeting everyone’s needs. 
Their own come last.

The reasons are familiar:

> There’s never enough time. 
> Doing things yourself seems faster (and better)
> They're afraid they'll be disliked if they say no

Still though: this logic doesn't hold up. 

When you don’t protect your boundaries and your energy, something will slowly fade away. Your sincere smile likely goes first. Then your presence and focus. Your temper. Worst case → you'll burn out (like I did). 

Leadership isn’t only what you give to others. 
It’s also about what you give to yourself, over time.

You can't be sharp, steady and effective if you permanently exclude yourself from your own priorities. 

Meaning: making space for YOU in your calendar.

And (sorry to say), this won’t happen on its own.

The tempo will not just "slow down". No one's coming to hand you more time.

You need to plan for it. With the same seriousness as the meetings you never cancel 😉

Something new is coming for women leaders who are tired of coming second in their own lives:

The first-to-know list is open >> https://lnkd.in/dNGbMbjR

I was the teachers' favourite in school. 

I'm sure you know the type: 

> Good grades
> Didn't cause any trouble
> Raised my hand before speaking and got seated to the rowdier ones to help keep them calm (how crazy is that?)

Oh, teachers loved me.
Later, managers did too.

I can see why – us good girls are easy to work with. 
We are very good at delivering without asking for too much in return.

I can also see this: 
Being “easy” earns you safety, praise and belonging.

Keeps you safe when you're young.
But in leadership?

Success built on fear – of disappointing, disrupting or being too much – demands constant proof.

It's tiring to be a good girl. 

And this is what I mean when I talk about being a bad good girl. 

How much of a bad good girl are you?
The Bad Good Girl Audit™ reveals 29 habits that women leaders use to stay safe, liked and in control – at the cost of their power and authority.

Comment AUDIT if you want to take the audit and get your Bad Good Girl profile pattern.

How much of a bad good girl have you become 

Here’s how to get really good at expressing clear boundaries. For free.

Step 1: Pick 3–4 real (or very likely) situations where you’ll need to set a boundary.

Step 2: Open your camera or voice notes.

Step 3: Record yourself saying it as if you were talking to the other person.
Do this for all scenarios.

Step 4: Watch or listen. What do you notice?

Step 5: Choose one thing to improve – then repeat from step 2.

You’ll likely spot things like:

> Rambling or over-explaining
> Saying ummmm.... 
> Sounding unsure or submissive
> Excusing yourself too much

Remember to breeeeeathe.
Keep it short. Keep it fun! You're playing. 

Do this 5 times, then review your first recording.
I’m pretty sure the progress will surprise you 🤓

Training boundary setting is like training any muscle.
This will build strength. And as a bonus, also your confidence.

Will you try this?

💛 This is one of the challenges I give the women in my 2-week Boundary Bootcamp. We just kicked off week two, and the wins the participants are sharing already make me so proud about their progress!

In October a woman joined Boundary Bootcamp after being close to burnout for a long time.

She was doing her job really well, being relied on, stepping in where things needed to be handled. 

From the outside, it looked like competence. 
From the inside, it was draining her.

In her check-in to the bootcamp she described full days, a constantly busy mind and very little space left for herself. 

Responsibility had its sneaky way of expanding, and she had bit by bit started to carry more than her own load.

A month or so after the Bootcamp she wrote me this:

“I’ve had great help from your sessions after being very close to burnout for a year. I felt a lot better after going through your 2-week program where I learnt to say no, delegate and not throw myself at every single task just to be good.”

Nothing about her drive or ambition disappeared. 
What shifted was how she related to it.

This is often how boundary work shows up.
As a series of small, conscious choices that create more room to breathe.

That’s the kind of change I care about.

graphical user interface, text, application

Hennes team hade fullt förtroende för henne.
Men uppifrån organisationen fick hon andra signaler.

När Anna kom till första träffen i Ledarprogrammet Perspeqtiv var hon osäker på om hennes sätt att leda verkligen var ett bra sätt att leda. 

Hon kände sig ifrågasatt och mikrostyrd. 
Inte riktigt uppskattad för det hon bidrog med, trots fina resultat och ett team som fungerade väldigt bra. 

Hon hade börjat tvivla på sig själv. 

Under programmets gång blev det allt tydligare att Anna har en mycket emotionellt intelligent ledarstil, och en inre kompass som leder henne tydligt och klart. 

Dilemmat var snarare om den här arbetsplatsen var rätt för henne. Och i att stärka hennes trygghet i hur hon leder, och hennes eget förhållningssätt till det. 

"Jag fick större tillit till mitt nuvarande ledarskap genom att bli speglad, utmanad och hjälpt av andra kvinnliga ledare i ett 100% tryggt rum." 

Hon började lita mer på sitt eget omdöme igen. Hon slutade tolka andras kontroll som en signal på att hon gjorde fel. Hon fick ord för allt det hon redan gjorde rätt.

Kort därefter tog hon nästa steg – till en arbetsgivare där hennes styrkor och ledarskap kommer till sin fulla rätt.

"Jag upptäckte att färdigheter som jag tycker är lätta och självklara, och därmed inte sett som speciella eller värdefulla, tvärtom är mycket värdefulla. Och att det inte alls är något alla gör, utan är en styrka i just mitt ledarskap."

Landa i sitt eget ledarskap, och sen landa på rätt plats. Den förflyttningen, på 10 månader – inte illa! 

Tusen tack Anna för att du valde att gå Perspeqtiv och stort varmt lycka till på nya stället! ✨

🔭 Nästa grupp i Ledarprogrammet Perspeqtiv startar i april. 
📧 Nyfiken? Hör av dig!

Who never blamed a Monday? Or January?
Easy explanations are tempting.
It takes more courage to ask why the same pattern keeps coming back.

“Oh, you know… it’s just one of those days.”

How many of "those days" are there? 

I surely had a few of them 😬
So I know they can be plenty. 

But who are we fooling? At some point, I had to ask myself a more honest question:

What if it’s not about timing at all?

What if the low energy, the resistance, the irritation keeps returning not because of the day, the hour or the colour of the sky... but because of something else?

You bet it was uncomfortable to realise that many of the habits and qualities that had taken me far in life were the same ones slowly wearing me down.

That insight came too late to me. I burnt out. 
But it can still change something for the better for you. 

I write about this in today’s newsletter.

We’ve made it past Blue Monday, the third Monday in January – supposedly the most depressing day of the year. The day when all kinds of shitty stars a

Open article: The convenience of blaming the calendar by Annika Mohlin 🌱 • 3 min read

There’s nothing wrong with New Year’s resolutions. But they won’t change a thing.

Action will.

Without a plan – and action of course! – resolutions stay what they are: thoughts, wishes, good intentions.

And you end up in the same place.

The gap between intention and action is where most resolutions fall apart.

And it’s also where clarity makes all the difference.

That’s what we’ll work on in my (free) New Year’s workshop on January 6. 

I’ll take you through a step-by-step process to help you:

>> Clarify where you want to be by the end of 2026 
>> Identify the steps and actions that will take you there
>> Anticipate challenges and how to handle them 
>> Make sure you stay on track and move forward 

You'll leave with a personal roadmap that's concrete, actionable and right for your life, your needs and your well-being. 

A roadmap for inspired, intentional action, that support your resolutions. 

If this sounds like a good way to start the year, I'd love for you to join! 

🗓️ Tuesday, January 6 (tomorrow!)
⏰ 13.00-14.30 CET 
💻 Online on Teams 
🌟 Free to join 

Sign up on the link on my profile, or here: 
https://lnkd.in/dwaT_m3n 

If you can't join live, I'll send out a replay to all who signed up. 

Looking forward to see you! 💛 

📸 Sweet words from previous participants... who also come back to update their roadmaps – because what we do works!

For female leaders done being the good girl | Lead yourself and others with clarity, boundaries and sustainable habits | Practice clear and kind boundary-setting in my 2-week challenge 👇🏼

Are you joining my New Years-workshop today?
Last chance to sign up... because we start at 13.00! 

This is a 90-minute workshop for ambitious women who want to keep performing at a high level + also have a life outside of work feeling happy and energized.

...which sometimes can be tricky, especially if you're stuck in good-girl-patterns that keep stealing your energy.

👉🏼 Taking time to yourself to listen inwards and get clear on what YOU want, and from there add concrete actions is a good way to start.

This workshop gives you time and structure for doing that.

So if you’re always there for others, but not-so-often for yourself: 

Here's a chance to really put yourself in the driver's seat, and create a roadmap for a year with YOU in focus. 

You'll also get some tools for energy and balance you can apply right away + a chance to join my 2-week boundary setting challenge with a little bonus 🎁

📅 January 6th = TODAY!
⏰ 13.00 - 14.30 CET
💻 Free to join, on Teams
✍🏻 Sign up here:

https://lnkd.in/dwaT_m3n

See you soon! 👋🏼

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Associate Certified Coach (ACC)

Certified GDQ consultant

The Daring Way - 

Co-Active Coach

ICF Member Badge

Företagsekonomi

Marketing the IKEA Way

Läst en termin i Madrid på Universidad Antonio de Nebrija

En termins studier i Madrid kombinerat med extrajobb som servitris på TGI Friday’s

Friskis & Svettis

Friskis & Svettis Malmö

Coaching female leaders to feel well, perform well and still have energy at the end of the day | Sustainable self-leadership | Personal & professional development | 25 years in Comms & Leadership | Ex-IKEA

🌱 I believe that people who feel well, perform well.
🌱 I believe that people who are self-aware, perform better and collaborate better. 
🌱 And I believe that in order to lead others, you need to lead yourself first. 

These beliefs are the foundation of what I do. My passion comes from my ability to help people grow and expand themselves beyond what they thought possible - and succeed. That's what I do best. 

🔸For you as a driven, high-performing professional or founder leading yourself.
🔸For you as a leader noticing that books, classroom trainings and TED talks don’t turn you into the leader you aspire to be.

I can help you start leading yourself in a more conscious way, 
get clear on who you are, 
where you're going and 
confident about the choices you make for yourself. 

So you can
🌱Perform and deliver — with a calmer mind and energy left at the end of the day. 
🌱Find a sustainable way of living and working — with ripple effects on both your leadership and your relationships.
🌱 Enjoy life on your terms and last in the long run. 

Why go with me? 
🔸With me you get a down-to-earth, warm and engaged partner who has been through the highs and lows of juggling a global manager role, a crowded diary and 3 kids. 
🔸You get a curious, open-minded ICF-coach who coaches by the high standards set by International Coaching Federation.  
🔸I bring energy, clarity and a holistic perspective (and a bit of playfulness). 

I am a great listener, but not afraid to challenge you. 
I have a creative mind, but can also be with serious emotions. 
I will hold a safe space, so you dare to look within for the answers I know you have. 

I can help you get to the front seat of your life and to design your unique roadmap, so that you can truly own your journey and fill it with what gives you energy and fulfilment.  

My approach mixes coaching with evidence based tools for self-leadership, stress management and well-being. The beauty is in the blend. 

All in a simple and action-oriented way - 20 minutes a day goes a long way. 
But those you need to commit to: I will give you the keys, but you have to turn them around yourself.  

📬I'm just a DM away. Let's talk! 

👋🏻
Here as HR or Manager? 
Happy to support your company and co-workers with developing (self-)leadership skills or communication skills. 

I am an appreciated facilitator thanks to my ability to create a safe, relaxed and inclusive space for participants. Talk to me about leadership development, creating effective teams or preparing your spokespersons for media engagements.

🌱Let's grow together!

An 8-week online program, available individually or in groups, in English or Swedish: 
for those of you who are longing to live life on your terms and are ready to take the driver's seat of your life. 

The program combines coaching with well-established self-leadership tools and techniques. You work at your own pace with a coach by your side to support you every step of the way.

Coaching Program: Own your Journey | English or Swedish | Next start January 2025

8 veckors online-program, enskilt eller i grupp, för dig som längtar efter att leva ditt liv mer så som du vill ha det och känner dig redo att sätta dig själv i förarsätet. 

Programmet är en blandning av coachning och väl beprövade metoder för självledarskap. Du arbetar på egen hand och tillsammans med en coach som finns med och stöttar dig hela vägen.

Coachprogram:  Äg din resa | Svenska eller engelska | Nästa start januari 2025

If you... 
Feel stuck. 
Want a change.
Search for the big meaning. 
Don’t know where to go next. 
Need action towards your goals. 
Want to grow your self-awareness.

Individual coaching online or IRL | Life | Career | Leadership | English or Swedish

För dig som vill växa i din chefsroll genom att jobba med verkliga utmaningar från din verksamhet och vara del av ett lärande nätverk med andra kvinnliga ledare: 
 
Vill växa och utvecklas tillsammans med andra kvinnliga chefer.
Är nyfiken på andras erfarenheter och perspektiv på dina utmaningar och ditt ledarskap. 
Vill fördjupa din självkännedom och hitta ditt trygga sätt att leda.
Tror på kraften i ett lärande nätverk där deltagarna stöttar och inspirerar varandra.
Har varit chef i några år.

Ledarprogrammet Perspeqtiv för kvinnliga chefer i Öresundsregionen | Start Februari 2025

I talk about the keys to sustainable self-leadership and how to last the long run.

Kick-off? Inspirational speaker? Action-oriented workshop? I can help.

Lectures | Workshops | Facilitation | Inspiration | Kick-offs

Welcome to browse around my website to learn more about me and GrowU. So far it's only available in Swedish. English yet to come!

Besök min hemsida för mer information |  Arbetar med företag och privatpersoner IRL och online

Jympa, Skivstång och Multifys 
Ledaruppföljare
Tidigare styrelsemedlem 

Leadership that doesn’t cost you yourself | For women leaders done with surface solutions | Authority without self-compromise | Popcorn Lover 🍿 | Get on the First-to-know-list 👇🏼

👋🏼Hello dear network – hej kära nätverk!👋🏼
De flesta som följer mig bor i Sverige. Jag skriver mest på engelska. Jag är nyfiken på vad du som ser mina inlägg tycker. Kan du hjälpa mig?

Most of my posts are in English, at the same time many of you are based in Sweden. 

I'm curious about how you experience it – and I'm asking everyone, not only Swedes.

Feel free to elaborate your answer - in Swedish or English - in the comments. Appreciate your help!
💛

What's it like for you reading my posts in English? 

To share or not to share... 💀

Excited to host this Live with 3 marketers + 3 coaches debating when it gets too much... and who gets to decide what IS too much. 

Log in and join us, bring your questions too!

Build leadership that doesn’t cost you yourself | I help female leaders lead themselves first | Self-leadership, boundaries & sustainable ambition | Get The Bad Good Girl Newsletter 📬👇🏼

For the people who think dangerously well. ​>​>​> Scaling Intellectual Authority / Thought Leadership 🌃 (Storyteller, raised on cyberpunk fiction.)

You’ve all seen it: The trauma-dump with a CTA. And then you wonder: Is this brave… or ...?

This audio Live is a real-time debate between people who build attention and people who protect nervous systems.

We are answering:
- Who decides when sharing becomes “over”sharing?
- When does “vulnerability” become “emotional burden” for the audience?
- Should you post while you’re still bleeding, or after you’ve processed?

We made a panel of 3 marketers vs 3 wellbeing coaches!

Team Wellbeing:
Our host Annika Mohlin 🌱 —  Self-leadership, boundaries, sustainable ambition.
Josh Perry — High Performance Coach (creation vs survival mode)
Emily Heird, LPC/MHSP — Licensed therapist & mental performance coach 

Team Marketing:
Jenni Reher — Marketing strategist, creator of Find Your Weird™ 
Sandra Macele — Identity & positioning strategist (thought-leadership infrastructures)
Robert van Tongeren — Content strategy that makes you look like a genius

Log in tomorrow, and bring your best questions ;) muahahaha ...

Ghostwriter & Messaging Strategist helping leaders achieve 70% opt-ins with a Microstory Journey using the 3-Minute Story Blueprint to build trust and convert hesitant prospects into eager customers.

Most businesses struggle to convert leads because they rely on forgettable downloads and meaningless discounts that fail to create an emotional connection. 

Prospects don't just need information, they need to feel valued, to trust you, and to experience genuine engagement. 

That's why I created the concept of the Microstory Journey, a 5-day emotional experience that uses the 3-Minute Story Blueprint to touch hearts, build authentic connections, and establish unshakable trust, turning hesitant prospects into eager customers ready to take action.

AWAI Verified Copywriter
Case Studies Certification
Sales Enablement Certification

WRITING SERVICES I PROVIDE:

📨 5-Day Education Email Courses
💲 Ghostwriting on Social Media Platforms
📰  Newsletters
🌐   Web Content
✍️   Blog Posting
📧   Email Marketing
🛒   Sales Pages
📱   Facebook/Google Ads 

WHOM I WORK WITH: I help executives, CEOs, founders, & coaches.

3 Simple Steps to Powerful Messaging
1. Define your goals and messaging. 
2. Develop a customized storytelling strategy. 
3. Execute and refine messaging for maximum impact.

HERE'S WHAT TO DO NEXT:
Email me at mike@mikehays.net OR
Book a call with me at https://calendly.com/ask-mikehays

Mike Hays

Stop Saying 'Should.' 

It's Killing Your Progress.

"I should prospect more." 
"I should post on LinkedIn." 
"I should work out."

Yet nothing changes. The list grows longer while your results stay flat.

Here's what actually happens when you 
replace "should" with different language:

Scenario 1: Your prospecting goal.

↳Old language:
"I should reach out to five prospects today."
Then guilt when you don't. Repeat tomorrow.

↳New language:
"I'm reaching out to five prospects today."
Or admit: "I'm choosing not to prioritize this right now."

↳Result: You either act or you own the choice. No guilt loop.

Scenario 2: Your content creation.

↳Old language:
"I should post three times this week."
Followed by excuses about time, perfectionism, fear.

↳New language:
"I must post three times this week to build my authority."
Or: 
"I'm not ready to commit to this yet."

↳Result: Clarity replaces confusion. Action replaces avoidance.

Scenario 3: Your personal commitments.

↳Old language:
"I should work out tomorrow morning."
Then snooze the alarm. Feel terrible. Repeat.

↳New language:
"I will work out tomorrow at 6 AM."
Or: "I'm prioritizing sleep over exercise right now."

↳Result: You honor your decision either way.

"Should" is the language of obligation without commitment.

It keeps you stuck in a cycle of intention without execution.

When you eliminate "should" from your vocabulary, 
you force yourself to either commit or let go.

Follow Mike Hays for more communication insights.

Mike  Hays

Messaging Strategist & Ghostwriter for Leaders - I help you turn short stories into trust, influence, and premium clients with my Microstory Journey using the 3-Minute Story Blueprint.

You know exactly what you need to do.
But you're still not doing it.

Here's why:

Your brain isn't lazy.
It's just running a calculation you don't see.

Every decision comes down to emotional math:
↳ Pain of taking action vs. pain of staying stuck
↳ Whichever feels heavier wins

I used to think I lacked discipline.

Turns out, I'd just linked massive pain to starting:
- Anxiety about failing publicly
- Worry about wasting time
- Fear of looking stupid

Meanwhile, staying stuck felt... safe.

Uncomfortable, sure. But familiar.

The shift happened when I realized:
Inaction has a cost too.

It's just quieter.
More gradual.
Easier to ignore.

So I started asking myself:

"What's the real pain I'm avoiding here?"

Usually, it wasn't the work itself.

It was the vulnerability. The visibility.

The possibility of being wrong.

Once I named it, the math changed.

Taking action became less scary than staying invisible.

Here's what I realized:
You're not avoiding action because you're broken.

You're avoiding it because right now, it feels riskier than standing still.

What pain have you been avoiding by not taking action?

Follow Mike Hays  for insights on doing the work that matters

How To Get Complainers to Stop Complaining
Without Losing Your Mind.

You enabled the complaining the moment you 
started validating every grievance.

And now you're stuck in an endless loop of 
negativity instead of progress.

But here's what most people miss - 
stopping complainers isn't about dismissing their concerns.

It's about redirecting their energy strategically.

Here's what's really happening:
↳ Your empathy becomes their permission to continue
↳ Chronic complainers seek attention, not solutions
↳ They control the conversation through negativity

Here's how to break the pattern:

1. Acknowledge Once, Then Pivot

↳ Validate briefly, then shift to action
↳ Don't get trapped in the complaint cycle
↳ "I understand. What's one thing you can control here?"

2. Ask Solution-Focused Questions

↳ "What would make this situation better?"
↳ Move them from problem to possibility
↳ Force their brain to think differently

3. Set Boundaries Early

↳ Be clear about your role
↳ People respect confident limits
↳ Define what conversations you'll engage in

4. Model the Energy You Want

↳ Stay solution-oriented in your responses
↳ Your tone sets the standard
↳ Don't match their negativity

What Most People Are Overlooking:
Everyone can listen.
Everyone can sympathize.
But only leaders can transform complainers into problem-solvers.

Quick Question:

When was the last time you got stuck in someone's complaint spiral?

How did you handle it?

Follow Mike Hays for more communication strategies.

They make it look so effortless.

That's what people say when they see polished work.

But here's what they don't see the invisible architecture behind it.

I used to think making work look easy meant hiding the effort.

The late nights.
The revisions.
The moments of doubt.

But the more I refined my process, the more one truth became obvious:

Work doesn't look easy because you hide the struggle.

It looks easy because you've done the hard work 
so many times that it becomes second nature.

And there are only two approaches to this:

The exhausting way
→ Reinventing the wheel every time
→ Burning out to meet deadlines
→ Starting from scratch repeatedly
→ No systems or frameworks
→ Relying purely on inspiration



The strategic way
→ Learning from past projects
→ Refining with each iteration
→ Making complexity invisible
→ Building repeatable processes
→ Creating templates and frameworks

One drains your energy.
The other multiplies your impact.

The best professionals aren't naturally gifted
they're systematically prepared.

They know that mastery isn't about working harder.

It's about working smarter until the complex becomes simple.

They've failed enough times to know what works.
They've refined their approach until it flows.

Not to show off.

But to deliver consistent excellence without the chaos.

Making work look easy isn't about pretending it's effortless.

It's about doing the behind-the-scenes work so well that others only see the result.

When you build the right systems, excellence becomes your baseline.

What's one process you've refined that now feels effortless?

Follow Mike Hays for more insights on strategic communication.

"Quick question" is never actually quick.

Feel That Stomach Drop?

I used to think it was just me.
Then, one day, I realized something:

"Those two words trigger an instant physical reaction."

I wondered why my stomach tightened every time I heard it.

It's always said like it's small. Casual. Friendly.
But the second you hear it, your body knows better.

Because "quick question" doesn't mean a question.

It made perfect sense to me.

It means a conversation.
With follow-ups. And feelings.

It's the verbal equivalent of: "We need to talk."

That pause you feel in your soul? You're not imagining it.

Here's what I learned about "quick question":
- Your stomach knows before your brain does
- Recognition beats explanation every time
- The tone is casual, the stakes are not
- It always leads somewhere bigger
- It's never one question

So here's my takeaway for anyone who's felt that tightness:

You're not overthinking it.
You're reading the room correctly.

Comment: "I've heard this one," and I'll share
the follow-up script that names what happens next.

Follow Mike Hays for more communication insights.

What's Controlling Your Life Right Now?
It's Not What You Think.

(And it's definitely not your circumstances)

Most people believe their life is shaped by what happens to them.
But here's the truth I've learned:

↳ Your decisions create your reality, not your conditions.

There are three decisions driving everything in your life right now:

1. What You Choose to Focus On

↳ Your focus determines your experience
↳ Not what's happening around you
↳ But where you direct your attention

2. Your Emotional State

↳ Your emotions shape your actions
↳ Your state creates your outcomes
↳ You can change how you feel in any moment

3. Your Blueprint

↳ The standards you've set for yourself
↳ What you believe you deserve
↳ These are your expectations

Here's What Most People Miss:

↳ They wait for conditions to improve
↳ They blame circumstances for their results
↳ They give their power away to external factors

The Real Shift Happens When:

↳ You rewrite your blueprint
↳ You realize you control your focus
↳ You take ownership of your emotional state

Your life doesn't transform when you get the promotion, 
find the relationship, or hit the income goal.

It transforms the moment you decide differently.

When you stop waiting for permission from your 
circumstances and start making different 
decisions, everything changes.

So here's my question for you:

Which of these three decisions do you need 
to take back control of today?

Follow Mike Hays  for more insights on intentional living

Fear Will Move You Forward 

But It Will Never Set You Free.

I've been thinking about what really drives most of us.

Here's what I've noticed:
Fear is the default setting.

Fear of failing. Fear of being judged. Fear of not measuring up.
It's exhausting, and it keeps you stuck in reaction mode.

Here's what I've learned:
• Both create movement, but only one creates freedom
• Fear pushes you away from what you don't want
• Vision pulls you toward what you do want
• Vision gives you energy; fear drains it

The shift happens when you stop running from 
something and start moving toward something.

When I switched from "I can't mess this up" to 
"I'm building something meaningful." 
Everything changed.

The work felt different. The decisions became clearer.

The pressure turned into possibility.

Fear will always be there, that's normal.
But it doesn't have to be in the driver's seat.

So ask yourself

What would you create if fear weren't calling the shots?

What vision would pull you forward if you let it?

Drop a comment or send me a DM
 I'd love to hear what drives you.

Follow Mike Hays for more communication insights.

Ever replay one harsh comment all day?

I do.

Someone once told me my work "lacked depth."
Not in a meeting. Not with context.
Just a quick message, then silence.

I couldn't shake it.

I replayed it during lunch.
During my next call.
Even while brushing my teeth that night.

The comment wasn't even detailed.
But my brain filled in the gaps with worst-case scenarios.

Here's what I learned:

Our minds magnify criticism.
→ One negative comment outweighs ten compliments
→ We loop it, dissect it, personalize it
→ It becomes louder than reality

But here's the shift:

That comment forced me to ask better questions.
Not "Am I good enough?"
But "What specifically can I improve?"

I reached out. Got clarity. Made changes.
The work got stronger.

Harsh comments sting because they touch something real.
The goal isn't to ignore them.
It's to separate the noise from the signal, fast.

Because replaying it won't help.
But responding to it will.

What's one comment that pushed you to level up?

🔔 Follow Mike Hays for more leadership strategies

You're watching the wrong thing during presentations.

The Signal That Tells You 10× More

That's what I realized after years of watching presentations.

But here's what most presenters miss:

The slides don't tell you if your message is landing.

The faces do.

People think I'm weird for watching faces instead of slides.

I used to obsess over perfecting every bullet point.
Tweaking fonts.
Rehearsing transitions.
Making sure the data looked flawless.

But the more presentations I attended, the clearer one truth became:

Your audience's reaction matters more than your content.

And there are only two ways to present:

The oblivious way
→ Never checking for understanding
→ Finishing on schedule regardless
→ Reading bullet points verbatim
→ Ignoring confused expressions
→ Staring at your own slides

The adaptive way
→ Reading the room constantly
→ Noticing when energy drops
→ Responding to nonverbal feedback
→ Pausing when faces show confusion
→ Adjusting pace based on engagement

One delivers information.
The other creates connection.

The best presenters aren't just speakers, they're observers.

They know a furrowed brow means "slow down."
They see glazed eyes and shift tactics immediately.

Not because they're mind readers.

But because they prioritize resonance over rehearsal.

Watching faces isn't weird.

It's the difference between presenting at people and communicating with them.

Your slides support your message, but faces reveal if it's working.

What do you pay attention to during presentations?

Follow Mike Hays for more communication insights.

Marketing isn't about volume.

It's about clarity.

We often assume more content equals more attention.
But in real business, especially when competing for seconds
positioning shows up in much quieter ways.

I started paying attention to the brands that 
consistently cut through the noise.

↳ They simply knew exactly why they mattered.
↳ They weren't everywhere.
↳ They weren't louder.

And once you notice it, you can't unsee it.

Most entrepreneurs skip the critical step:
Defining what makes them irreplaceable.

They plunge into content, ads, and campaigns
but struggle to explain their unique value in a single sentence.

The assumptions?

↳ "Our product speaks for itself."
↳ "We'll figure it out as we grow."
↳ "People will understand what makes us special."

But without clarity, your message gets lost
and your budget gets burned.

Three truths about positioning in the attention economy:

1. If you can't explain your edge clearly, 
don't expect your audience to figure it out.

2. You're not competing for market share.
You're competing for milliseconds of attention.

3. Vague positioning doesn't win that battle.

Here's what sets standout brands apart:

↳ They lead with relevance.
↳ They craft messaging that cuts through noise.
↳ They anchor every campaign in a crystal-clear answer to: 
"Why should I care?"

Compare that to those stuck in generic slogans, 
feature lists, and "we're better" claims.

One approach resonates.
The other fades.

Before your next campaign, pause and ask:

What makes us the only choice for the right people?

Can you explain your unique value in 10 words or less?

Follow Mike Hays Mike Hays for more messaging insights.

How Saying Less Helped Me Hear More.

I've been guilty of this for years.

Nodding along while mentally rehearsing my response.

In meetings, I'd:
➤ Plan my counterpoint
➤ Wait for the pause
➤ Polish my story

I wasn't listening.
I was loading.

Then I realized something:

The people I trusted most never did this.
They asked follow-up questions I didn't expect.

So I changed my approach.

Instead of preparing what to say next, I started tracking:

• Where their energy shifted
• What they didn't say directly
• What they emphasized twice
• Questions that would go deeper

That's when conversations became different.

Because real listening isn't about silence.
It's about curiosity.

Stop rehearsing your brilliance.
Start discovering theirs.

The best responses come from what you actually heard, 
not what you planned to say.

Follow Mike Hays for more leadership advice.

51,500 AI layoffs hit Dow, UPS, Amazon, Pinterest.

There’s one skill AI still can’t replace.

 Because the market isn’t hinting anymore, it’s shouting:

Dow: ~4,500 jobs cut (about 13% of the company). 
UPS: up to 30,000 roles on the chopping block. 
Amazon: about 16,000 corporate jobs eliminated. 
Pinterest: about 15% of staff cut as restructuring accelerates. 

This isn’t random. It’s directional.

And the question nobody wants to say out loud 
is the one that hits at 2am:

“If my job is a set of tasks… am I at risk?”

Then the dividing line becomes obvious:

The one skill AI can’t replace is the ability to 
communicate in a way that changes behavior.

Not “being articulate.”
But creating clarity, trust, and alignment,
especially when stakes are high.

 AI replaces output.
 It doesn’t replace leadership.

And communication is what leadership looks like in plain clothes.

If you want to be future-proof, stop asking, 
“What tool should I learn next?”

Start asking, “Can I move people with clarity, empathy, and precision?”

What’s your plan to sharpen that this month?

Follow Mike Hays for more communication skills training.

Messaging Strategist & Ghostwriter for Leaders - I help you create instant credibility that gets replies, calls, and conversions with my Microstory Journey using the 3-Minute Story Blueprint.

Introducing the Fishbowl Practice

The First Method That Neutralizes Criticism Anxiety

(The drill that builds emotional armor)

I help smart people stop talking like robots.
But here's what nobody tells you:

↳ The fear of criticism keeps you sterile.

My Fishbowl Practice changes that:

1. Write Your Worst Nightmares Down

↳ Every harsh comment you fear
↳ Every cruel judgment possible
↳ Drop them in a fishbowl

2. Pull One Daily

↳ Record your response on camera
↳ Just you and the discomfort
↳ No script, no safety net

3. Watch Your Transformation

↳ Week one: You'll stumble
↳ Week two: You'll find your voice
↳ Week three: You'll own your message

4. Build Resilience Through Repetition

↳ Criticism loses its power
↳ Your authentic voice emerges
↳ Confidence replaces performance anxiety

5. Turn It Into Content

↳ Your growth becomes your story
↳ Your vulnerability becomes your authority
↳ Your responses become YouTube Shorts

The Real Win:
When you can handle the fishbowl, real comments feel easy.

I'm starting this series next week.
Each episode: one comment, one raw response, zero editing.

Quick question:

What's the harshest comment you're afraid to receive?

⤵️ Drop it below
Follow Mike Hays for authentic communication strategies

"I wasn't ready for that."

We say it all the time.

But what does it really mean?

Most people think it's about surprise.
About being caught off guard.

But I've learned something different after years of working with leaders and founders.

"I wasn't ready for that" actually means three things:

↳ First: I didn't prepare mentally.
We knew it could happen, but we didn't visualize it. We didn't rehearse our response.

↳ Second: I underestimated the emotional weight.
Logic told us one thing. Reality hit differently. The gap between knowing and feeling is massive.

↳ Third: I didn't build the support system.
We tried to go it alone. No mentors. No peers who'd been there. No framework to lean on when it mattered.

Here's what I've noticed:

The leaders who say "I wasn't ready" the least aren't the ones who predict everything.

They're the ones who prepare differently.

They don't just plan for outcomes.
They prepare their mindset.
They build their network before they need it.
They create frameworks that work under pressure.

Being ready isn't about knowing what's coming.

It's about building the capacity to handle what you can't predict.

The next time you catch yourself saying "I wasn't ready for that," ask a better question:



🔔 Follow Mike Hays for more strategies on leadership and growth

Have You Ever Won the Argument

But Lost Every Relationship in the Process?

Being right doesn't matter if nobody wants to work with you afterward.

Yet most of us prioritize correctness over connection every single time.

Here's what I've learned about the cost of being technically right:

Scenario 1:

You catch an error in someone's presentation.

↳Old approach:
Point it out immediately in front of everyone.
Make sure they know you spotted it first.

↳New approach:
Pause. Consider the setting.
Pull them aside later with a quiet heads-up.

↳Result: They fix the error and remember your respect.

Scenario 2: A team member suggests a flawed strategy.

↳Old approach:
Shut it down with data and logic.
Prove why it won't work, point by point.

↳New approach:
Ask questions that guide them to see the gaps themselves.
Let discovery replace demolition.

↳Result: They learn. They don't resent you for it.

Scenario 3: Someone challenges your expertise publicly.

↳Old approach:
Defend your credentials with force.
Make them feel small for questioning you.

↳New approach:
Acknowledge their perspective.
Share your reasoning without needing to dominate.

↳Result: The room sees your confidence and their dignity intact.

Being right with the wrong tone doesn't build influence.

It builds walls.

When you choose connection over correction, people actually hear you.

So here's what I'm asking myself now:
What's more valuable, winning the point or keeping the relationship?

Follow Mike Hays for more communication insights.

I used to think "watch me fail first" was about humility.
But it's actually about permission.

Most people wait for proof before they start.
➤ They need someone else to go first.
➤ They need validation.
➤ They need certainty.

I realized something different:

"Watch me fail first" means I'm willing to be the example.

Not because I want to fail.
Because I'm willing to learn in public.

Here's what that actually looks like:

• Testing ideas before they're perfect
• Sharing lessons while I'm still learning
• Making mistakes visible so others can skip them
• Building credibility through transparency, not perfection

The leaders I respect most aren't the ones who never stumble.

They're the ones who stumble forward and document the path.

Because when you say "watch me fail first," you're really saying:
"I'll take the risk so you don't have to guess."

That's not humility.
That's leadership.

Stop waiting for permission to be imperfect.
Start creating the path others are afraid to walk.

Your willingness to go first is your competitive advantage.

Follow Mike Hays for more leadership advice.

I blamed my audience for three years.
(they weren't the problem)

The silent killer in every conversation:

Clarity isn't what you say, it's what they understand.

My Wake-Up Call:

→ Perfect presentations
→ Detailed explanations
→ Logical frameworks
→ Zero conversions

I kept thinking:
"Why don't they get it?"

The Real Issue:
↳ I prioritized being right over being clear
↳ I explained features, not transformations
↳ I spoke my language, not theirs

Then I shifted everything:

New Approach:
↳ Watch their faces, not my slides
↳ Test every message with real people
↳ Ask "what did you hear?" not "did you understand?"

The Results:
↳ Clients repeating my message back perfectly
↳ Referrals using my exact words
↳ 3x higher engagement rates

The Truth:
If they didn't get it, your message failed - not them.

Quick Question:

When was the last time you tested your message before blaming your audience?

Struggling to capture attention in conversations?

Start with vulnerability.

I used to think I needed perfect stories to connect with people.
Then, one day, I realized something:

My mistakes were more interesting than my wins.

I wondered why some conversations felt flat while 
others sparked instant connection.

The difference wasn't polish or perfection,
it was honest, human moments that people could relate to.

It made perfect sense to me.

So, I started opening conversations differently.

Weeks went by.
And engagement transformed with every vulnerable opener.

Networking events? Deeper connections.
Client calls? Trust built faster than ever.

And because I led with authenticity,

I stopped trying to impress everyone
and started building real relationships that mattered.

Here's what I learned about conversation starters:
- "I regret this…" invites empathy immediately
- "Don't do what I did" positions you as a guide
- "This is embarrassing" breaks down walls instantly
- Vulnerability creates permission for others to open up
- People remember how you made them feel, not how perfect you sounded

So here's my takeaway for leaders and communicators:

Lead with your humanity
or keep having forgettable surface-level conversations.

Comment: "I lead with vulnerability," and I'll share my conversation framework for building instant trust.

The Smallest Edit That Changed Everything

I almost didn't make the change.

For months, I'd been sending cold outreach messages to potential clients.
Same template, same structure, same disappointing results.

Then I changed one sentence.
Just one.

Instead of opening with "I help executives craft their messaging"...
I wrote: "I noticed your recent post about struggling to stand out."

That's it.
Seven words became twelve.

The response rate jumped from 8% to 34%.

Same offer.
Same credentials.
Same me.

But here's what actually shifted:

I stopped talking about myself first.
I started with them.

It forced me to do the work before I hit send:
→ Understand their actual challenge
→ Show I was paying attention
→ Read their content

The tiny change wasn't really about the words.
It was about respect.

It proved I valued their time enough to be specific.
That I saw them as a person, not a prospect.

Now I apply this everywhere:
In emails, in stories, in every message I craft for clients.

Because people don't ignore relevance.
They ignore generic.

What's one small change you've been avoiding
that might actually transform your results?

Sometimes the difference between invisible and influential
is just twelve words.

Follow Mike Hays for more communication tips.

I shot 39 videos to get ONE right.

Was it worth it? Here's what I discovered.

Most creators say, "just hit record and post."
But after my marathon reshoot session, I learned:

↳ Perfectionism vs. progress is real.
Here's what I found on both sides:

The Pros:

Clarity improved dramatically
↳ By video 20, I knew exactly what to say
↳ Each take refined my message
↳ Confidence grew with repetition

Delivery became natural
↳ Eye contact felt genuine
↳ No more reading scripts robotically
↳ Energy levels peaked at the right moments

The Cons:

Time investment was massive
↳ Editing through 39 takes? No way, didn't do it!
↳ 3 hours for one 60-second video
↳ Diminishing returns after take 25

Overthinking killed spontaneity
↳ Started sounding too rehearsed
↳ Lost the raw, authentic moments
↳ Perfectionism became procrastination

The Key Insight:
↳ Beyond that? You're polishing, not improving.
↳ There's a sweet spot around 5-7 takes.
↳ Done beats perfect every single time.

My new rule:

Three takes maximum, then ship it.

What's your video recording process? One take or multiple?

Drop your number below
🔔 Follow Mike Hays for more content creation insights

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