Meghann Misiak

I work with top SaaS sellers who have outworked, out-hustled, and out-performed. But are now looking for something deeper...
 
→ Real relationships vs transactional sales calls
→ Driving real impact vs. competing with buyers
→ Feeling fulfilled vs. drained by your career
 
If that’s you, welcome. You’re not alone.
 
And luckily, there are better ways to sell… and to LIVE.
 
I’m Meg, aka That Sales Witch 🔮
 
Yes, I have 10+ years of sales, leadership, & enablement experience working with companies like Blend, Movable Ink, Deel, & Hubspot.
 
But my real magic?
 
→  Making buyers feel safe enough to say yes.
→ Helping sellers manage energy as much as pipeline.
→ Moving through every deal with clarity, confidence, & presence.
→ And a little sales therapy… working through blocks, recognizing patterns, & breaking through performance plateaus.
 
Because my strategy isn’t a script. It’s a state of mind.
 
Deeper focus.
Sharper boundaries.
Authentic influence.
 
And helping you WIN MORE and WORK LESS.
 
Bc the reward should never be working more... 
It should be having more time for the things that really matter.
 Your life, your family, your hobbies, your dreams (and hint... no one's actual dream is hitting quota).
 
Here are ways I’ve helped clients win (check out my testimonials for more):
 
🏆 Doubled win rate in 1 year
🏆 Increased av. deal size by $100k in 3 months
🏆 Sold biggest deal in company’s history
🏆 Hit #1 seller in company… multiple years in a row
🏆 Featured on conference stages & pods like 30 Min to President’s Club
 
And also...
 
- Closing laptop by 6pm most days
- Waking up an hour early to meditate & make breakfast for the kids
- Having enough free time to build a banjo & prepare a DJ set for the radio
- Lowering stress levels & finally feeling present with partner & family
 
This is the stuff that really matters.
 
If these sound like goals you can get behind, feel free to book a no-pressure consult with me to explore.
 
And a tiny bit about me as a human:
 
📍 Based in Mexico City
😸 Lover of cats, scented candles, & iced matcha lattes
🔮 Addicted to healing &amp; reader of palms, auras, & tarot
📚 Obsessed w magical realism, witchy queer fiction, & yeah a lot of self-help

Director of Enterprise Sales

Working to help the New Retirement team & our clients find new levels of success through elite, enterprise sales strategies at an organizational level. Building a team & results that are predictable, scalable, & repeatable. Maintaining the organization's incredible culture while redefining what's possible.

Meghann Misiak 🔮

The most annoying corporate words of 2025… and what to replace them with in 2026.
 
 
Because if I hear “synergy” one more time, I’m launching myself into the sun.

🤗  

2025: Low-Hanging Fruit
2026 replacement: Snackable Wins
"Can we start by identifying some snackable wins? My pipeline is hangryyy."

2025: Touching Base
2026 replacement: Energetic Poke-Poke
“Just giving the project a lil poke-poke to see if it’s alive.”

2025: Synergy
2026 replacement: Mutually Assured Slay-age
“Looping you in because this collab could trigger Mutually Assured Slay-age across the entire team.”

2025: Take This Offline
2026 replacement: Send It to the Shadow Realm
“Let’s send this convo to the Shadow Realm before it consumes the whole meeting.”

2025: Move the Needle
2026 replacement: Nudge the Cosmic Playlist
“Let me know what you need from me to nudge the cosmic playlist on this one.”

2025: Quick Sync
2026 replacement: Chaotic Alignment Sprint
“Let’s run a Chaotic Alignment Sprint before this project fully flies into the sun.”

2025: Bandwidth
2026 replacement: Emotional WiFi
“Sorry, my emotional WiFi is running on one bar today.”

💜 

Try these out with your own teams & let me know which one is their favorite!

F*ck Hustle Culture | Crush Your Quota, Not Your Soul | That Sales Witch l Coaching Top Sellers to Win More & Work Less | LinkedIn Lunatic | Big Fan of Flowers, Fiction, Matcha, & Cat Content

I love taking a break from using LinkedIn on my computer...
 
 
 
 

 
To sit back & open LinkedIn on my phone.

🤳

F*ck Hustle Culture | Crush Your Quota, Not Your Soul | That Sales Witch l Coaching Top Sellers to Win More & Work Less | Big Fan of Flowers, Fiction, & Cat Content

My brain at 2am: “Remember that time in 3rd grade when you called your teacher "mom"?”
 
 
 
 

My brain at 2pm: can’t remember my own password.

🫠

I finally wrote about that strange, magical identity crisis that happens after burnout.


New newsletter is live.

Come read if you’ve been unraveling too. 💜

View newsletter: Letters to My Burned Out Self

(And.... who you become when you stop chasing it.) ✨ For most of my life, I carried the title high performer like a talisman. My entire life was cente

Open article: The Myth of the High Performer by Meghann Misiak 🔮 • 4 min read

Signs your job is quiet-quitting you.
 
 
 
If you’ve ever felt that eerie feeling of “something is off” at work but couldn’t articulate it...

Here are a few signs that your JOB is failing you.

Not the other way around.

🙅‍♀️ 

→ Your 1:1s keep getting canceled or shortened to 7 min of nothing.
→ You only hear from leadership when something goes wrong.
→ Your ideas “don’t fit the priorities”… until someone else suggests them.
→ You’re called "a team player” but never get support yourself.
→ You’re doing three different jobs… & getting paid for one.
→ You stop getting feedback (both good & bad)
→ Metrics change monthly, but expectations stay sky-high.
→ You dread simple tasks you used to enjoy & feel disillusioned.
→ You stop chasing accomplishments bc no one celebrates them anyway.
→ You’re told to “be patient” while watching others leapfrog ahead.
→ The culture's shifted but leadership pretends like everything's ok.
→ Decisions come down from “the top” & no one can explain the logic.
→ You feel more like a resource than a human... useful until you’re not.

🙈 

In these situations, you’re no longer growing.

At some point, you gotta shift from “What’s wrong with me?”

To “What part of me is shrinking to fit this role?”

That’s when the real magic starts.

🔮

Hi, I’m Meg aka That Sales Witch. I help sellers win more & work less. Follow for more unfiltered magic.

Is healing from burnout the ultimate anti-aging secret?!?!? 
 
 

I was looking through old photos with my fiancé & he randomly goes:

“Uhhh… why do you look YOUNGER now?”

And honestly? He’s kinda right.

😅 
 
Back then I was “thriving”

Winning awards, posing with trophies, popping champagne like a girl boss on a mission.

But behind the smiles...

→ Eye bags for days
→ Skin dry enough to exfoliate a brick
→ Posture that looks more like performance
→ Hair dyinggg under all the bleach 

🫠 

And sure, I upgraded my skincare… (thanks k-beauty) but this was something DEEPER.

Back then I was surviving, not living.

After 5 years of recovering from burnout...

→ My nervous system is actually regulated.
→ I rest... regularly.
→ I'm not sprinting for validation 24/7.
→ My life supports my body instead of breaking it.

And apparently?

My face noticed.

Anyone else familiar with the pure GLOW that comes from healing??

💜

Hi, I’m Meg aka That Sales Witch. I help sellers win more & work less. Follow for more unfiltered magic.

Anyone here for more *witchiness* at corporate events?
 
 
I know I am. But I'm a bit biased.

😈 

If you're looking for something different than another generic team-building event that everyone complains about...

Give your team something they’ll remember for YEARS.

It's called The Energy Audit.

→ Aura portraits
→ Energy analysis
→ Nervous system insights
→ Real conversations

Imagine an experience people talk about instead of “politely survive.”

Corporate events just got a whole lot more MAGICAL.

💜 

Currently booking for 2026!

Here are my favorite ways to regulate my nervous system + stay present in every moment...
 
 
 
Bc every well-regulated witch has an entire *toolkit* of rituals!

→ Morning meditation + breathwork + reiki
→ Mapping out key priorities for each day
→ Walks in the sun to get matcha lattes
→ Lighting incense & calling it aromatherapy
→ Color-coding my calendar by priority (duh)
→ Mindful Mondays & Flow or Follow-Up Fridays
→ Bi-weekly therapy (somatic + parts)
→ Cortisol-lowering 30-min meal prep
→ ADHD & chakra playlists for work sessions
→ Kitty snuggles aka avoiding slaps w murder mittens

And taking long walks around the city to snap pics of the prettiest flowers I can find.

It's rituals like this that allow me to not only FEEL good... 

But to do my very best work.

🌞 

What about y'all? 

What are your favorite rituals to feel your best?

If you want your sellers to communicate better + build trust quicker… start with their energy.
 
 
Not just their scripts.
Not just their talk tracks.
Not another mandatory training.

When people see how they’re actually showing up (grounded, anxious, disconnected, or open)...

They shift faster than any coaching session could ever force.

The Energy Audit is my new favorite enablement tool.

And yes… it works.

Beloved Community

Create and implement new systems to optimize client management, revenue forecasting, and project management by leveraging several software technologies and effectively building collective buy-in from cross-functional internal stakeholders, resulting in a 400% increase in client retention.

Co-create strategic outreach and marketing plans to advance $1 million revenue goal for a new stream of the nonprofit’s funding source (fee-for service revenue) while securing 30% of targeted revenue goal.

Independently collect, centralize, analyze and visualize KPI and customer satisfaction data for senior leadership to support strategic decision-making related to the fiscal health of the organization.

Develop one-pagers, slide decks and other marketing materials needed to share Beloved’s story with hundreds of potential clients/partners across various industries and sectors.

Contribute to the creation and spearhead implementation of best practice capacity management, strategy, to aid and improve operational performance and employee health.

Assess existing capacity and develop sales plans and forecasts based on future plans for demand.

Provide research on potential clients, industries and regions for strategic review and analysis.

Track data on client readiness assessment, proposal matrix, and proposal outcomes.

Participate in the hiring, training, supervising and/or evaluating  of Beloved staff as needed.

Support the overall administrative efficiency of the Business Development team by serving as a problem-solver.

Clearly internalize, personalize and communicate Beloved Community’s theory of change, mission, model, services and unique value proposition.

Associate Director, Business Development

Study Smart Tutors

Managed 25+ current partnerships and developed 50+ new partnerships in a new region to successfully meet $500k revenue target.

Developed and presented novel conference presentations on Cultural Competency and Social-Emotional Learning at WESTOP, Northern California Professional Development Seminar and Central California Professional Development Seminar.

Championed, managed, and executed dozens of new internal operations projects and external service offerings to strengthen partnerships and enhance the client experience.

Trained and coached dozens of tutors and instructional staff to deliver high-quality instruction that is tailored toward a first-generation college-bound student audience, in both virtual and in-person environments.

Spearheaded social media engagement and email marketing strategies, increasing our social media engagement by 369% and reaching new markets outside of California, including Arizona, New Jersey, Georgia, and Kansas. 

Expanded the organization’s market reach into the hyper-competitive region of Central California by deepening relationships with TRIO leaders in the region, effectively seeding over $100k in new revenue in 2020.

Associate Director of Partnerships, Northern & Central California

C2 Education

Effectively leveraged my academic expertise, sales experience, and high level of diligence to execute the generation and booking of new and existing families for academic services.

Provided consistent and meaningful customer service with 67+ current and 208+ prospective families which led to a 90% increase in quarterly bookings for the center.

Executed engagement and communication plans effectively to enable the center to achieve a monthly average of a 300% conversion rate of current families into renewal and 50% conversion rate of prospective families into enrollment.

Managed class schedules, in addition to other administrative support duties,  to effectively staff sessions and meet company efficiency and usage targets. 

Provided marketing support by participating in school and community events as a C2 representative.

Ensured diligent execution of C2 programs and initiatives through differentiated targeted instruction and tutoring of students in various subject areas, including test prep (SAT, ACT, SSAT, HSPT), college essay support, French/Spanish studies, K-6 Math and K-12 English/Writing.

Education Coordinator & Teacher

Teach For America

Co-instructed and co-planned 4th grade Common Core reading curriculum at Epic Charter School Summer Program for twenty 4th and 5th grade students.

Trained in the principles and execution of inclusive lesson planning (UDL), specialized instruction of ELL students and elementary school classroom management.

Instructed a multilingual kindergarten classroom of 18-30 students at REACH Elementary School in Oakland, CA.

Leveraged conflict resolution skills and mindfulness practice into classroom engagement to meet students’ socioemotional needs in a developmentally appropriate manner.

Corps Member & Kindergarten Teacher

Occidental College Office of Admission

Interviewed dozens of prospective applicants, conducted quarterly parent information sessions, and worked with executive admission staff on special projects, including the recruitment of targeted students.

Compiled and recorded results from dozens of individual interviews to include in student applications. 

Provided individualized counseling and external resources for dozens of prospective students navigating the college application process.

Senior Admission Fellow

City and County of San Francisco

Recruited 50+ community leaders for mobilization event attendance and volunteering efforts.

Aided in organization and execution of pre-mobilization events in District 9, including literature drops to 60+ homes in the district.

Assisted fundraising director and campaign manager with administrative tasks to meet important deadlines.

Collected 2,000 signatures from community members to officially register supervisor candidate on voters' ballot.

Campaign Intern (Hillary Ronen for District 9 Supervisor)

Supported and maintained Occidental College's Multicultural Visit Program that serves to welcome dozens of underrepresented prospective students to campus through overnight visits each year.

Planned, coordinated, and executed a 3-day program schedule for over 40 visiting students during the fall semester.

Advertised and managed recruitment events to recruit 40+ overnight hosts through the Office of Admission.

Diversity Initiative Intern

Coordinated among individuals, city agencies, and the business community to solve protracted, multi-layered issues for over 59,980 constituents in District 9; handling among 5-10 cases simultaneously. 

Effectively resolved issues regarding public safety, housing, homelessness, planning/transportation, and small businesses by promoting self-advocacy among constituents and/or advocating on behalf of constituents from marginalized communities. 

Conducted background research for legislative aides to enhance both the outreach for the opening of San Francisco's first adult LGBT homeless shelter and the advocacy efforts toward equitable regulation of short-term rental companies in the city.

Constituent Services Representative (Office of District 9 Supervisor David Campos)

Occidental College Politics Department

Translated and organized data on 18 Latin American constitutions based on gender-specific articles. 

Collected and analyzed 50+ primary source documents from political parties in Mexico to create real-time data sets of 2015 election results and track gender parity (sub-national and federal government positions).

Searched, compiled, and analyzed 75+ news stories from Latin America newspapers to create a timeline of key players and events during the 2015 general election.

Research Assistant

Imprenta Communications, Inc.

Promoted a PG&E Communities of Color social media campaign through the company’s youtube channel; received over 1600 views since inception. 

Surveyed over 250 high schools in the Bay Area to support the equitable implementation of BART’s low-income youth discount program.

Garnered support from over 25 Asian-American health care organizations for the Californians Against Higher Health Care Costs for No on Prop 45 campaign.

Conducted community outreach to over 40 community-based organizations in LA to increase awareness of  the 911 Anaheim Police Department campaign

Public Relations Intern

Building Systems & Community to Promote Equity-Centered Practices & Drive Organizational Growth

I develop and execute strategies to cultivate and manage client relationships, improve customer experience, and sustain the fiscal health of human-centered organizations. I bring extensive experience in navigating the complexities of the social impact sector, including education, public affairs, and nonprofits. My focus lies in developing strategies that not only meet client needs but also contribute to sustainable growth and positive community impact.

I often leverage my skills in CRM software management, proposal writing, project management, and change management to help develop high-quality services and solutions that advance equity and inclusion for diverse communities. I am passionate about collaborating with internal and external interest partners to create and implement innovative projects and service offerings that align with the strategic direction and vision of equity-centered organizations. 

Ultimately, I'm most passionate about fostering equitable systems and nurturing relationships grounded in mutual support and growth, and I seek to use my expertise and experience to drive positive social impact.

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