Coen Tan 陈坚明 Strategic Business Storyteller

Ministry Of Influence

Reflective. Empathetic. Possessing the innate ability to connect deeply with people. Coen envisions a world in people flourish by living their authentic selves. He believes that every person deserves to be seen, heard and appreciated. 

He brings his unique experiences from his recovery from depression, to inspire his audiences with heart-warming stories. Fluent in English and Mandarin, he has spoken in Singapore, China, U.S.A., Canada, Australia, India, Thailand, Malaysia, Philippines, Nepal, Sri Lanka and Taiwan.  Over the past 12 years, he has inspired and helped over 45,000 individuals and professionals to develop influencing skills, and powerful confidence. 

He believes that businesses can improve productivity, unlock innovation and forge employee engagement by creating safe spaces where individual stories can be heard.

Global Speaker, Speech Coach, Facilitator, Podcast Host

Speak to Peak

Developed Training Programs in the Areas of Interview Skills and Public Speaking.
Conducted Train the Trainer Sessions to Recruit and Train new Trainers.
Marketed and Done Sales for New Training Programs

Training Director

Wing Tai Holdings Limited

Designed, Developed and Conducted Training Programs in the Areas of Customer Service, Sales, an Leadership.
These Programs are under the WSQ Framework under WDA.

Trainer and Training Program Developer

Civil Service College

Developed Training Programs in the Areas of Leadership, Innovation and National Policy Development.
Worked with Trainers to Plan Training Program Curriculum, and Create Case Studies
Evaluated Trainers and offered Suggestions to Improve Training Program Delivery

Senior Executive (Learning Development)

Inspiring Leaders to Express with Conviction, Clarity, and Courage.

I help leaders speak with clarity, conviction and courage.

Over the past 18 years, I’ve coached and trained professionals across 18 countries to express themselves to impact.

I was once a shy, sensitive boy who felt misunderstood. My own journey of transformation - through storytelling, and trauma-informed practice now forms the foundation of WholeHearted Influence™.

Through keynotes, leadership training, and coaching, I help leaders:

- Become a trusted mentor and respected leader without having to be loud
- Be connected deeply with themselves and their authentic strengths
- Create psychologically safe, high-performing teams where innovation flow

If you’re ready for real transformation and keen to take action, let’s connect.

"𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘦𝘤𝘩 𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳!"

A fellow participant said to me.

Immediately, I replied "No! I'm just here to learn!"

And I was 100% sincere about it!

[Aside: In case you're wondering, this is NOT an open pitch to speak]

Just yesterday, I attended LinkedIn 4.0 event, organised by my friend Dr Azhar Ahmad here in KL.

I bought a ticket, booked my bus tickets and hotel to come to this event to learn, and to support and meet my friends Johan Irwan Kamarozaman and Melissa Indot, who were speaking.

And I took away a lot from the event!

Here are my top 3:

1️⃣ 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗣𝗼𝘄𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝗳 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗺𝘂𝗻𝗶𝘁𝘆
I think that 3 things that happened in the past few years have shifted how we relate, connect and learn – Covid 19, A.I., and increased geopolitical tensions.

• We see technology dominate the news
• We feel the disconnect, we were locked in our homes
• We hear about deportations, erecting trade barriers, and talking of war

But at the very basic primal level, we have a desire to connect, to hug each other, to share a conversation over coffee and snacks.

We're dying to just live that out, a reason to gather as a "silent rebellion" against forces that want to keep us separate.

2️⃣ 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝗼 𝗖𝘂𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗮 𝗚𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁 𝗘𝘃𝗲𝗻𝘁
The theme of the event was Creativity - and that's a topic that captured my interest.

Throughout the event:

• We breathed and relaxed ➡️ then we danced and was moved by music
• We dived into our imagination to draw images ➡️ Then we're invited to let go of control – even our imagination – when we did fluid art (A wonderful concept I've never heard of before!)

The combination of speakers, the program flow, all contributed to a great learning event. I've never seen an event where people interacted so fluidly, laughed so much. The whole day just flew by!

In the pre-event group chat, many people were saying they're introverts and it was their first networking event!

3️⃣ 𝗜𝗻𝘃𝗶𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗼 𝗕𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝘂𝗺𝗮𝗻

One of the nice little touches, is that we were given 2 "stickers" at the start of the event - 1 to write our names, and the other to write our hobbies.

Straight away that broke the ice between people. We aren't just floating names, our faces and how we dressed. Here's something personal, and fun about ourselves.

"Oh you like hiking too?"
"What do you like most about children storytelling?"

These become conversation starters that instantly broke the ice between strangers - which shows whatever psychological barriers such as:

• I'm introvert
• I'm scared of networking
• I don't know what to say after "hello"

All gets tossed into the bin! People chatted and talked freely!

As a speaker, being the sage on stage is my comfort zone. But learning how to build and empower communities is a skill I'm still learning.

It will help me to impact even more people.

For that, I leave with my heart full and mind enriched! And met many cool folk too!

#WholeHearted #Networking

Coen Tan, CSP

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘞𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘢 𝘚𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘢𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘯 𝘌𝘢𝘵 𝘊𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘯 𝘙𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘒𝘓?

That's was the thought that crossed my mind. Most Singaporeans would agree with me that Malaysian (and KL) food is nicer than in Singapore.

But chicken rice? I've to say, I've to say Singapore's better. Sorry 🇲🇾

But you see, this is not just any chicken rice.

This one comes with a story, which I first heard from a post by Crystal Lim months ago.

This Chicken Rice is the signature dish of Ming Palace Restaurant in Corus Hotel, KLCC.

Story has it that Andrew Khoo's father, Tan Sri Khoo Kay Peng, the founder of MUI Group loved the chicken rice at Chatterbox Restaurant in Singapore, that whenever he's in Singapore, he must eat there.

When Tan Sri started the hotel in 1984 (originally called Ming Court Hotel), he wanted to recreate the Chatterbox recipe. So this recipe has been passed down for over 30 years.

When I heard of this story way back in August, my mouth watered so much I wanted to try it. Moreover as a business storyteller, I'm a sucker for a good story!

So when I texted Crystal that I will be in KL, she invited me to this dinner, a chance I cannot pass up!

So what's my verdict?

I would say that while the chicken is similar to those served by most chicken rice stalls in Singapore, what made it stand out are 2 things:

• The rice was soft and extremely fragrant, perfectly absorbing the chicken stock, with a strong hint of garlic and ginger.
• The chili sauce was the winner for me! While most chicken rice chili in Singapore are quite watery, this one has a healthy dose of minced garlic and chili in them. I'd say it was more like a "chili and garlic chutney" than a chili sauce. The blend of fruitiness, fragrance of garlic and the thick texture makes it go so well with the rice and chicken
• The only thing I would improve is to give more of the chili sauce!

I WholeHeartedly Loved It!
Not only was the food great, I got to meet friends I've known, Caleb Low, Winston Liew and some cool folks some for the first time, some I have connected with on LinkedIn, like Adrian Ung, Gary Lim, Alex Yap, Salem G., Nim S..

The iconic Corus Hotel have been sold to Mah Sing Group, with plans to redevelop the property. 

So if you're in KL, and want to have a taste of the chicken rice, please head to Ming Palace below it shuts in Jan 2026.

Thanks Andrew Khoo for hosting, and Crystal Lim for inviting me.

#WholeHearted #Foodie

𝗕𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗡𝗲𝘄𝘀! 𝗔𝘆𝘂𝗺𝗶 𝗛𝗮𝗺𝗮𝘀𝗮𝗸𝗶'𝘀 𝗦𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝗼𝗳 𝗕𝗲𝗻𝗲𝘃𝗼𝗹𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗥𝗲𝘀𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲

She had to cancel her concert in Shanghai – 14,000 fans who'd bought tickets, all told they couldn't come.
 
So J-pop artist Ayumi Hamasaki did something unexpected.
 
She refunded everyone. Every single ticket.
 
Then she performed anyway... To an empty arena.
 
She sang, danced, gave her full set to 14,000 empty seats. Her team recorded it all.
 
When asked why, she said simply: "𝘌𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘣𝘦 𝘢 𝘣𝘳𝘪𝘥𝘨𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦."
 
Wow! This is what being connected to your purpose really looks like!

When caught in between a political tensions, the kind that create disconnections. instead of stepping back, she leaned in.

Her actions spoke louder than any words could.

That reminded me of my conversation with Sera Chang Li Ling recently in KL, when we were chatting about our purpose for work.

I shared with her "𝘐 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 "𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘦𝘳" 𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘵𝘺𝘱𝘦, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴." 

And I felt a jolt of energy when I declared that.

As I reflected back on:

👥 The best workshops I've facilitated
🎤 The most memorable speeches I've given
✈️ Why I love travelling and learning about cultures
📊 The best results my coaching clients have achieved
🎙️ Why I started and continued my ❤️WholeHearted❤️ Podcast

They've one thing in common – 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀:

• With themselves – to heal their wounds, to reclaim their voices, to unleash their strengths
• With each other – mutual understanding, team bonding and effective collaborations
• With their purpose and vision - to live life on their teams, to achieve breakthrough

Okay Coen, let's get realistic! How is this going to help:

• Drive business growth?
• Stay relevant and afloat?
• Defeat the competition and dominate the market?

Yes, these are the ultimate aim of all businesses, and it should be.

But the clients I work with know that when there's internal connection and alignment between vision, culture and healing and growth, results will follow.

Like Ayumi, I love building human connections and bridges.

I am always fascinated by how we can be so different yet so similar.

That's why I love connecting, understanding and doing my little bit to build more:

• 𝗨𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 – in a world increasing splintered by geopolitics and economic protectionism
• 𝗘𝗺𝗽𝗮𝘁𝗵𝘆 - at a time when A.I. will only amplify income and skill gaps between the "haves and have-nots"
• 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻 – when we see increased tech connectivity but more loneliness

Ayumi Hamasaki has spoken her truth.
I'm inspired to do the same.

Will you join me too?

#WholeHearted

𝗗𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗵... 𝗗𝘆𝗶𝗻𝗴... 𝗥𝗲𝗯𝗶𝗿𝘁𝗵... 𝗙𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁𝘀... 𝗧𝗿𝗮𝘃𝗲𝗹

All within, a span of 6 weeks...

Recently, I was responding to a post by Pearling Lim when she asked "What's something that shifted your world in the last 6 weeks?"

Wow...

Where do we start?

In the last 6 weeks... 

💔 I lost a dear friend to a sudden death.
😱 Travelled to Davao, experienced not 1 but 2 massive earthquakes in a day. Talk about shifting my world.
🇵🇭 Attended Gallup Strengths Training in Manila, and became a Certified Gallup Strengths Coach.
🎂 My friends Judy Liu and Henry C. Wang decided to prank me with a "fake Birthday Celebration" - I call it Rebirth!
🇨🇳 Attended a 1 week NTU-Tsinghua University Travel and Learn Program in Shenzhen, learning about Industry 4.0 and the AI developments in China.
✈️ Flew to Wuxi, China where I facilitated an Inclusive Leadership Workshop.
😶 A key team member resigned, and we're not replacing her while recalibrating my strategic direction for 2026.
👨‍🏫 Conducted my first Strengths Workshop.
📘 Attended 2 book launches of my good friends Cindy Tien, James C Foo Leong, inspiring me to write mine too!
💲Submitted course materials of my signature 🧲Magnetic Storytelling Program for IBF (Institute of Banking and Finance) for approval, Financial Advisors, my program will be available to you soon!

It seemed like a lifetime of experiences all compressed into 6 weeks.

And still I feel like I am just keep go go go!

That's the nature of our lives isn't it?

That we don't pause and give ourselves permission to:

• Process all that's happened and how we are changed by it
• Grieve all that we've lost - closed ones, working relationships
• Really listen to our bodies and what they need from us

Are we really put on this earth to keep going through experiences?
Do we just keep our heads down and continue to chase the horizon?

These are some of my contemplations when I pressed pause and take a morning walk at MacRitchie Reservoir yesterday.

Just giving myself permission to be.
To bathe in the moment and appreciate.
To be grateful to be alive at this moment.

Are we living our lives?
Or... Are you lives living us?

Do you give yourself permission to pause?

#WholeHearted #PermissionToPause

"𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘋𝘰 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘉𝘶𝘪𝘭𝘥 𝘊𝘰𝘯𝘧𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦?"

I asked Dr Azhar Ahmad 🩺 while chit-chatting before our podcast interview.

"By doing things!" He said, and we both laughed out loud in unison at that comment.

Yes! There really is no substitute for being in action.

But question is, what kind of action?

Some actions just feel so hard and fearful!

My Advice? 𝗕𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 & 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗦𝗺𝗮𝗹𝗹.

Here's a couple of examples.

𝗣𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝗔: 𝗟𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝗻 𝗛𝗶𝘀 𝗛𝗲𝗮𝗱

Recently, I met a man in his 30s going through career break. As I spoke to him, I found out that he's exploring many options for the next phase of his career.

Each time I asked him what has he done, his reply was, "Nothing, but I've been reading about it."

I also sensed that he's somewhat bereft of confidence. Although he would go in great details about ideas, the words don't carry weight.

So I changed topic, "Have you been travelling since you're on career break? You have the time and don't have to apply for leave!"

"I don't really see the need to travel. I can read about the different places." He replied.

I think I see it. He's hiding away in his head.

We trick our egos into thinking we "know" something just by reading about it. We live in the safety of our head knowledge, without risking it being tested or challenged.

We don't live in the real world, but we live in our heads.

We rather settle for head knowledge, instead of really going out there to live it, experience it and learn from it.

In this way, we actually become lonelier and more ignorant.

So I told him, "Just go somewhere you've never been to before. Start somewhere nearby, e.g. Penang. Open up your senses, your heart to the world, and you'll grow from it."

When he came back, he excitedly told me about the things he saw, what surprised him, and his world gradually open up again little at a time.

𝗣𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝗕: 𝗜𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗶𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗯𝘆 "𝗛𝗶𝗴𝗵-𝗟𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗹" 𝗣𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲

Another friend told me she has confidence issues talking to people she deem as "superior" to her. 

However, she also volunteers as a mentor in a program where she get to meet the other mentors, many who've retired after illustrious careers as senior corporate leaders, successful entrepreneurs.

Since I know this friend wants to give herself more exposure as a thought leader, I gave her an idea: Why don't you start a podcast and invite all of these people onto your show?

This will achieve a few effects:

1. Give her an excuse to talk to these "high-level" people
2. She gets to mine valuable insights and lessons from them
3. She gets to position herself more in the public eye as connected and sophisticated

𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗖𝗮𝗻 𝗕𝗲 𝗚𝗮𝗶𝗻𝗲𝗱 𝗖𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲𝗹𝘆

You don't have to force yourself to start a business, run a marathon or something audacious to gain confidence.

Be Creative. Start Small.

Travel somewhere. Find ways to engage others.

You've got this!

#WholeHearted

𝘐'𝘮 𝘛𝘳𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘒𝘓 𝘵𝘰 𝘚𝘦𝘦 𝘢 𝘋𝘰𝘤𝘵𝘰𝘳!

Not just any doctor, but Dr Azhar Ahmad, a self-styled "Careerlogist."

What's that? 

Maybe someone who diagnose your career problems and offer a solution? 😃

A Malaysian medical doctor turned medical scientist, a remarkable global career than spanned living in Germany, England and U.S.A.

And today, still incredibly cool, a LinkedIn and TikTok influencer.

I think he's older than me biologically, but way younger than me psychologically. (Curious Case of Dr Azhar Ahmad?)

I'm excited that he's agreed to be on my ❤️WholeHearted❤️ podcast. In his words, it's his first time recording a podcast in a studio. 

Glad he gave me his "first time"!

In this time of extreme geopolitical, economic and financial uncertainty, what questions do you have to ask him about:

• Career tips?
• How to have such a young and "childlike" mindset?
• How he still has such a zest for life (he's now obsessed with cross-fit)?

Or any other questions, please feel free to comment below. I am sure to "goreng" (turn up the heat) him during our podcast interview, so that he will expose his secrets to a wonderful career and still maintain such a lightheartedness.

Or if you are shy, you can also DM me your questions, and I hope I can ask your questions during out podcast.

I will be interviewing him on Friday at 3 p.m. KL/Singapore time, so if you've any questions, be sure to send them in before then!

Bro's nowadays so relaxed, enjoying life travelling. Let's make sure we make the most of his wisdom shall we?

#WholeHearted #WholeHeartedPodcast

𝗜'𝗺 𝗧𝗼𝗼 𝗔𝗶𝗿𝘆 𝗙𝗮𝗶𝗿𝘆 𝘁𝗼 𝗥𝘂𝗻 𝗮 𝗕𝘂𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀

That's something that I've been mulling for a long time, and frankly, it sometimes cripple me!

I often compare myself with other people in business and feel I don't measure up.

• People are single-mindedly focused on their goals and would hustle to get there.
• Others are so disciplined, that they can wake up every day and work on the same thing until it gets done.
• Everyone out there is crushing their goals, achieving new milestones
  
But me?

Not gonna lie, it's not all desserts and roses everyday.

Yes, there are fun days when I'm engaged by clients who trust in me, and where I can use my strengths to serve people.

Bonus is when I get to travel to new places, meet new people and facilitate uplifting conversation.

But most people don't realise that it takes a lot of work to get these. Days when it feels like you're marketing but shouting into a void. Attending sales calls, writing proposals, getting rejected, but you have to rise and do-it-all again.

And for a long time, I think that perhaps I'm:

• Not disciplined and focused enough
• Too curious and easily fascinated by bright-shiny objects
• Too idealistic, choosing to believe in a world where everyone could and should be their most beautiful selves.

In short, I wondered if I'm too "airy-fairy" to be in business.

But when I attended my Gallup StrengthsFinder Certification Program last month, suddenly everything clicked!

Especially when I understood my Top 5 Strengths and what they mean:

1️⃣ 𝗜𝗻𝗽𝘂𝘁: It means that I love learning and collecting random information (which are often apparently unrelated to my work). That explains why I'm so curious
2️⃣ 𝗜𝗱𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻: I'm gifted at finding patterns and linkages between disparate topics, and come up with fresh ideas
3️⃣ 𝗔𝗱𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆: I live in the moment, which is why I am extremely present. And my Improv training also kicks in when I'm able to go with the flow, even in stressful situations
4️⃣ 𝗘𝗺𝗽𝗮𝘁𝗵𝘆: I'm able to feel other people's emotions, often even when they are unaware themselves
5️⃣ 𝗦𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗴𝗶𝗰: I can evaluate several options without rejecting any, and come up with the best pathway towards a goal (they often are a hybrid combo fit for the specific context).

Seeing my strengths these ways help me see the goodness in them, instead of just what's lacking.

More importantly, it helps me connect the dots about how I best serve my clients.

My clients have often said I provide safe space, and that I fully understand them. And I'm able to come up with unique solutions when I consult with them.

More importantly, the 1st 4 strengths may mean that I'm often fluid, but I can lean on my #5 strength of Strategy to help me stay grounded, and choose the most practical, actionable solutions.

Strengths don't operate in isolation. It's how we integrate them – I call it "Wisdom Stack" – that helps us flourish.

#WholeHearted #GallupStrengths

𝘔𝘺 𝘏𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘌𝘹𝘤𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘥! 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘓𝘦𝘨𝘴 𝘊𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘔𝘰𝘷𝘦

Location: Anglican High School, Singapore
Date: 2nd January 1994

"If you're keen to join the badminton team, please head to the school hall for selection trials now!"

The announcement played over the PA system.

That year, my school principal pioneered the idea of "sports class", which means that sports teams players are grouped into the same class, so that they could focus on training during competition season, and teachers would give them remedial classes closer to the exams.

Special treatment.

And, the school had just hired a coach from China, NOT just any coach! It's Zhao Jian Hua, former world champion, a player I idolised when I watched him on TV.

Those powerful jump-smashes and athletic lunges! To be coached by him would be a dream!

My heart shouted, "Go for it!"

But my head whispered, "Are you sure? What if you're rejected?"

My head won...

That day, on the first day of school, I chickened out of the trials.

Little did I know my life would take an unfortunate turn.

I didn't join the badminton team, but instead joined the Scouts, thinking it would make me more independent and tough.

But the Scout troop had a toxic bullying culture, where the seniors would pick on the juniors.

I fell into bad habits, staying up to play video games and binge on chocolates. At my heaviest, I weighed 99 kg!

Cue, even more bullying.

Years later, I got to know the Badminton Captain, and in a casual conversation, I asked him "What made you join the team?"

His answer surprised me, "You know what? I've never even picked up a racket before that day! But I was chosen because I was fast and athletic! Never try, never know!"

𝘞𝘏𝘈𝘛? 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘺 𝘴𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘭! 𝘐𝘧 𝘐'𝘥 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘢𝘭𝘴, 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥'𝘷𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘯!

That to me, is my BIGGEST Regret till this day.

If I'd joined the badminton team, maybe:

• I'd be more confident
• I wouldn't be overweight
• I wouldn't have been bullied

But, I'm left only to contemplate "What if...?"

"Don't live in regrets!" We're often been told, but I humbly disagree.I believe that dismissing regrets is a wasted learning opportunity.

As I read Daniel Pink's book "The Power of Regrets", the biggest lesson I've learnt is this:

“𝗥𝗲𝗴𝗿𝗲𝘁 𝗿𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗮𝗹𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘄𝗲 𝘁𝗿𝘂𝗹𝘆 𝘃𝗮𝗹𝘂𝗲, 𝗮𝗻𝗱, 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗳𝗮𝗰𝗲𝗱 𝗵𝗼𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗹𝘆, 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘄𝘀 𝘂𝘀 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝗼 𝗹𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿.”

For me, the biggest lesson I've learnt is this:

"In life, you will be rejected. But 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝘄𝗵𝗼 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱𝗻'𝘁 𝗿𝗲𝗷𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗶𝘀 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗥𝗦𝗘𝗟𝗙!"

We fear being rejected by others so much that we reject ourselves first.

That's a defence mechanism. But that also keeps us playing small!

From that day onwards, I've resolved to work towards self-acceptance, self-backing.

What's a regret from which you've learnt?

#WholeHearted

"𝘔𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘢 𝘧𝘶𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘦!"

These words were part of a quip by Patrick Lencioni on a webinar that I attended recently.

Okay, now that I've gotten your attention with that hook, let me share some context.

It was actually a webinar on 𝗖𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗻𝗮𝗴𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁 – always a relevant topic, perhaps more so today.

Patrick shared about his recent move to Tennessee from California, a place he'd called home for nearly six decades, including 30 years in the same neighbourhood. He sold the house where he'd raised his family and said goodbye to lifelong friends.

This experience echoes the work of transition expert William Bridges, who identified seven kinds of losses that everyone faces during major change:

• 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗳 – The physical spaces and routines we call our own
• 𝗔𝘁𝘁𝗮𝗰𝗵𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀 – Relationships and communities that ground us
• 𝗠𝗲𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 – The sense of purpose tied to our roles and environments
• 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗿𝗼𝗹 – The ability to influence our surroundings and decisions
• 𝗙𝘂𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 – The plans and expectations we’ve built over time
• 𝗜𝗱𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝘁𝘆 – How we see ourselves in relation to where we are and what we do
• 𝗦𝘁𝗿𝘂𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 – The daily rhythms and frameworks that give life predictability

These losses are not reserved only for negative events. Even positive transitions, like marriage or a new leadership role, require letting go. 

Hence that humorous statement at the start of this post.

It was truly an insightful takeaway for me - 𝗜'𝘃𝗲 𝗻𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗺𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗽𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗹𝗼𝘀𝗲.

Change is inevitable, especially today. Organisations seem to be in a constant flux of restructuring and adapting to latest changes in tech and industry dynamics.

However, most 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗰𝘂𝘀 𝗼𝗻 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗴𝘆 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗲𝘅𝗲𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻, 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗻𝗲𝗴𝗹𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗲𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲.

They've probably even gotten quite skilled and creative at "selling the vision" of change, but are met with resistance.

Sometimes, employees may even feel gaslit by being deemed as "resistant to change."

However, understanding the psychology of the resistance can help us be more empathic towards people facing change:

• Turf may mean a favourite office
• Attachments could be colleagues or mentors
• Identity is one of the hardest as many have their identity tied up to their roles
• Structure is another toughie as the way they've always operated get disrupted

These are deeply human factor, not just organisational.

I hope that leaders can take these into account when:

• Designing change
• Communicating change
• Provide support for people during change

What's your Biggest Takeaway from this post?

#WholeHearted

𝗕𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗣𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗶𝗻 𝗦𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗮𝗽𝗼𝗿𝗲... 𝗦𝗼 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁?

I went to KL to meet someone cooler!

Black who? 🤣

I sat down with Dr Azhar Ahmad 🩺 to interview him for my ❤️WholeHearted❤️ Podcast, and what an experience it was! 

What was supposed to be an hour-long interview turned into 1 hour 40 minute conversation. Time just flew by!

We dove into a variety of topics, such as:

• Why he left medicine to join the pharmaceutical industry.
• His career moves to the UK, Germany, and the US over 27 years, driven by a persistent sense of curiosity
• How he overcame the fear of the unknown and building confidence by tackling challenges in small, manageable steps.
• Why simply letting "your work speak for itself" is insufficient.
• How consistent pursuit of learning now sees him "obsessed" with CrossFit, and creating social media content.
  
I am so glad I had the "𝘮𝘶𝘬𝘢 𝘵𝘦𝘣𝘢𝘭" (thick face - which is a Malay slang for audacity) to invite him on my podcast!

I am so lucky that through my podcasting journey, I benefit from learning the mindsets and wisdom of world-class leaders like Dr Azhar Ahmad 🩺 .

The episode is currently being edited, so watch this space as it will be dropping soon.

Meanwhile, you can check out the ❤️WholeHearted❤️ Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcast or Youtube.

Links in the comments below.

#WholeHearted #WholeHeartedPodcast

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