𝗔𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝗶𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝗼𝗳 𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘁𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗹𝗲 𝗶𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝗹?

So many senior leaders are. 
(I was too).

When I burned out in 2023, I realised the issue wasn't high workload - it was the 𝘣𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘨 inside me. Trying to be perfect on all fronts: high-performing Private Equity investor 𝘢𝘯𝘥 present mother.

𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂? 
Do you sometimes feel tension, disrupted sleep, emotional overload, or even stubborn physical symptoms?

Nothing is wrong with you.

Your nervous system is doing its best to protect you.
It just wasn’t built for the pace you’re holding.


𝗪𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘀𝘆𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗺 𝗶𝘀 𝗹𝗼𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗰𝗮𝗽𝗮𝗰𝗶𝘁𝘆?

Start with my proprietary 𝗡𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗼𝘂𝘀 𝗦𝘆𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗺 𝗖𝗮𝗽𝗮𝗰𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗜𝗻𝗱𝗲𝘅™, a 5-minute self-assessment measuring four core pressure points:

  • Emotional labour load
  • Bracing patterns
  • Internal conflict
  • Recovery quality

You'll receive your personalised score and recommendations you can apply immediately.

(You can access it in my 𝘍𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘥 section).


𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝘆 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗱𝗲𝗲𝗽𝗲𝗿 𝘀𝘂𝗽𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁, feel free to explore:

𝗘𝘅𝗲𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗦𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻 - a targeted 105-min experience helping reduce your stress reactivity, and restore your regulated baseline.

𝗜𝗻𝗳𝗹𝘂𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗮𝗹 𝗟𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺 - for those who want to build sustainable authority without self sacrifice.

𝗘𝘅𝗲𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗧𝗲𝗮𝗺 𝗥𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗪𝗼𝗿𝗸𝘀𝗵𝗼𝗽𝘀 - for organisations ready to reduce emotional labour load and build collective resilience.

If any part of you is tired of holding it all together, this experience gives you a different way forward.

Happy to connect if it resonates.

If you removed performance for one day... what would be left?


If you stripped away all you know about performance for 24 hours, 
What would you notice about yourself?

(I’m not talking about your role/ revenue/ team size, impact you’re craving)

Just:

How you speak to yourself when nothing is being measured?


Recently, through my own deeper internal work,
I've been reminded of something profound:


𝗟𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝗯𝘂𝗿𝗻 𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗿𝗲𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝘀𝗲𝗹𝘃𝗲𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗲 𝗱𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸 -

(yep, please stop blaming the workload)


The inner critic that never rests.
The replay loop at midnight.
The part that believes your worth is always one achievement away.


I have those parts too.
But the more gently I meet them,
the more capacity I have inside.


And from that place, 

Your performance, relationships, achievements etc emerge naturally.


𝗦𝗼 𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲'𝘀 𝗮 𝘀𝗺𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘄𝗲𝗲𝗸𝗲𝗻𝗱:

When you catch yourself evaluating who you are -
pause and ask:

𝘐𝘧 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸..
𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘐 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥?


The next evolution of leadership is in a different relationship with the person who carries it all.


𝘉𝘵𝘸, 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘢 𝘵𝘳𝘺 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘬𝘦𝘯𝘥, 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘥 𝘶𝘱 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶 - 𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘦𝘷𝘢𝘭𝘶𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 :)


---

Elena Shirokaya

Hi, I’m Elena 👋

I am passionate about empowering women leaders through efficiency and inner balance💡as well as creating a sustainable future via Climate PE investing  🌱📈


*My services for Senior Executives:

Over the past 12 years, I’ve worked with and performed diligence on 50+ leadership teams from investment funds and corporations.

Unique Approach: I combine the Internal Family Systems (IFS) and body movement practices.

Courses:

=> Self Activate: A short, pre-recorded course designed to help women leaders increase their efficiency by releasing stress and activating inner energy. 

=> Lead from Within: My flagship course, crafted specifically for women combining high paced leadership roles with active family life. 

In 5 weeks guided course, we deep dive into how IFS and body movement practices can help you increase efficiency while maintaining inner balance.

Executive Coaching:

I offer tailor-made coaching sessions in various modalities, such as IFS, Cognitive behaviour therapy, human design and others. 


*Career Highlights:
- Investment Management and Consulting: 20+ years of experience.
- Master in Psychology Candidate at Arden University.
- IFS Practitioner: Level 1 ongoing with IFS Institute in Madrid.


*My Services for Institutional investors in Climate via PE/VC:

In the investment realm, I’ve led due diligence in PE and VC investment funds. I have managed investments totalling a 9-digit figure in USD and handled an investment portfolio 5x that size. 

In 2024, I founded Private Equity for Climate Ltd., an investment consultancy dedicated to guiding institutions in sustainable and climate-focused investments.

I help institutions navigate the complex landscape of climate and sustainability information and invest in Climate via PE/VC funds. 

My services include:

*Impact Advisory*: Framework and reporting.
*Due Diligence*: Climate and Impact PE funds.
*On-Demand Support*: Assistance in PE fund investing.


👋 Get in touch with me:

For advisory work on climate: info@privateequityforclimate.com

For executive coaching:
elena@selfforprofessionals.com 


Specialities:
✔️ Board / Executive Decision-Making ✔️ ESG Integration / Investments ✔️ Climate PE / Impact Investing ✔️ PE / VC Funds / Due Diligence ✔️ Risk Management / Compliance ✔️ Board Level Stakeholder Engagement  ✔️ Investment Strategy Development  ✔️ Investment Appraisal   ✔️ Portfolio Optimisation ✔️ Investment Policy Development  ✔️ LP Advisory Board Member ✔️ Compliance / Due Diligence   ✔️Board Governance ✔️ Internal Family Systems ✔️Executive coaching

Ex-Private Equity Investor | Nervous System Strategist for Executives | Helping Leaders Expand Capacity into Sustainable Influence & High-Stakes Performance | Psychology + Somatic Therapy-Trained | Mother of three

I once hit a ceiling I couldn't out-think or out-work,


On the outside, I was still performing.
Still the present, engaged mother.

But inside, something felt impossible:

I didn't want to compromise my presence with my kids.

And I didn't want to dim my ambition either.


That tension - that 𝘱𝘶𝘭𝘭 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘥𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 - 
is the real ceiling most high performers hit.

It is a sign your current capacity has been outgrown.


If you feel that mix of pressure and hopelessness,
You're not failing.

You're standing at the crossroads where 

the next level doesn't come from pushing harder - 

It comes from internal restoration.


Often, the signal is simple:

One part wants more.
One part feels at its limit.


The worst thing you can do is silence it.
The smartest thing you can do is create enough space to understand it.

That's the work I do in the Executive Restoration Sessions - for individuals and teams ready to grow from stability, not strain.


Whatever method you choose, the key is this:

Give that internal conflict room.

Let it speak.

It's often the doorway to your next chapter.


𝘉𝘵𝘸, 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘦 𝘤𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘴𝘳𝘰𝘢𝘥𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧, 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘰𝘶𝘵. 𝘐'𝘮 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘋𝘔𝘴.


---

You can't see people accurately when your own system is bracing.


Over the past months, I've been doing the kind of inner work that doesn't just give you new tools - it upgrades how your system responds under pressure.


And what surprised me most is this:

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗜 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗺𝘆 𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗽𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗻𝘀,
𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗰𝗮𝗽𝗮𝗰𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗜 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝘀.


Not the theoretical, "be an empathetic leader" kind. 

The real kind - that 𝘴𝘰𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘥𝘨𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶.


And I frequently see this in senior executives:

You think you are evaluating your team's performance.

But you may be just reacting to your own internal pressure.


The part that wants to look competent.
The part that fears being judged,
The part that believes slowing down is dangerous.


When those parts quiet, something shifts:

People stop being "difficult".
Conversations stop feeling heavy.
Tension dissolves that would've taken months of "feedback cycles".


Leaders don't need sharper judgement.

They need more internal space.

The clarity and influence come from your ability to see people accurately, not through the lens of your own pressure.


If you've ever felt that you "should" be more patient, more present, more grounded, -

You probably need more room inside your system to breathe. 


Happy Monday! Would love to hear from you:

𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘦, 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘧𝘵𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶 - 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘦, 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦, 𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦?


---

You can do both, know your stuff and still be on the way.

If you’ve ever looked at my work and thought,
“she really has this figured out”, 

Let me correct that.

Even as I shifted gears to nervous system strategy after 20 years in investing & consulting, 

Learning this field and helping leaders see the benefits of it for them & their organisations, 𝘩𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘴 𝘮𝘦 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘺.


And even now,
I’m still unlearning and recalibrating.

Stress doesn’t disappear just because you understand it.
Biology takes time.

Life keeps giving us new material.


Maybe that’s why executives come to me after the doctors, the supplements, the yoga apps, the “mindset work”.

When they realise their 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘣𝘣𝘰𝘳𝘯 𝘴𝘺𝘮𝘱𝘵𝘰𝘮𝘴 𝘮𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘣𝘦 𝘢 𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘴𝘺𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘮 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘤𝘬 𝘪𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘷𝘪𝘷𝘢𝘭 𝘮𝘰𝘥𝘦. They just give it a try.


𝗛𝗮𝗽𝗽𝘆 𝗧𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗸𝘀𝗴𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴, if you celebrate it today!

And thank you to everyone,
for being here.

For growing with me.
For letting me build this work in public, 
evolving and honest.


And if you’ve been curious about nervous system restoration
but never made the time,

𝗜’𝗺 𝗼𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝟯𝟬% 𝗼𝗳𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗘𝘅𝗲𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗦𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻 as a gesture of gratitude and Black Friday.

Use code: RESTORE30 to book here:
https://lnkd.in/df4CQ-yh

Valid until Sunday midnight CET time.

If your system has been asking for a gentle reset, this is your window. Perhaps it’s time.


With gratitude,

Elena


---

Nervous System Strategist for Executives | Creator of the Nervous System Capacity Index™ | Helping leaders reduce stress reactivity so you perform at a high level without burning out | Ex-Private Equity Funds Investor

We don't talk enough about how heavy 𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐫 weighs on leaders and teams, 

yet it predicts burnout more than the workload.


Life likes to be ironic - I accidentally deleted Monday's post on  #BringYourWholeSelfToWork, 

which feels fitting - similar things happen within organisations every day: 
the human parts disappear, the professional mask stays.


Anyway, here is what 𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐫 is - 

the invisible effort of managing your inner world so you can appear 

"appropriate/ professional/ unbothered/ strong"  - whatever your workplace expects from you.

(OR what you expect from yourself as a leader).


Peer-reviewed studies show that emotional labour is one of the strongest predictors of burnout, even more than long hours or task load.


(𝘐 𝘭𝘦𝘧𝘵 𝘢 𝘴𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘭𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧-𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘤𝘬 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴.
𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘬 𝘺𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 3 𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦..
𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘸𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘺𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘮 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘤𝘦𝘴𝘴)



So, what do we do?

1. Organisations need training

Real training - not resilience posters or yoga-at-lunch. 
Capacity-building, internal conflict management, emotional regulation - these reduce burnout significantly. 

This is the work I do with leadership teams, helping them reduce emotional labour and rebuild capacity.  


2. Individuals need support

If you want to understand your own emotional labour profile or why your system feels overloaded even when your calendar looks "fine", I can walk you through it.


Whatever modality you choose, 

Naming and reducing your emotional labour load, builds resilience for you and your organisation.


---

There are two types of pressure. And only one helps you grow -


People often ask:

“Do you help with pressure management?”

Of course.
Which kind of pressure?

There are two types -
and your body knows the difference instantly.


1️⃣ 𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗱𝘂𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗣𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗲

The healthy kind.
Chest open.
Breath steady.
You leave the conversation with that tickly feeling of expansion.


2️⃣ 𝗦𝘂𝗿𝘃𝗶𝘃𝗮𝗹 𝗣𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗲

The kind that drains you.
Jaw locked.
Shoulders raised.
You leave the room feeling slightly off, even if the meeting went well.


Same situation.
But internally?
These sensations are worlds apart, and you catch yourself trying to get rid of survival pressure with more discipline, or even destructions, then feeling guilty, not enough, you name it.


What happens is survival pressure accumulates. 

Push through once. Then again, and it goes on repeat.

Your results look fine, but your nervous system is keeping the score - until one day, everything looks like a threat.


If this is happening in your world, here is the thing:

𝗣𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗶𝘀𝗻’𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗯𝗹𝗲𝗺.
𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘀𝘆𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗺 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗽𝗽𝗲𝗱 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝗮𝗳𝗲 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗿𝘆𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝗹.


Next time pressure rises, just notice:


Is my body tightening?
Or expanding?

It’s one of the fastest ways to understand what’s actually happening inside you -
before it becomes a pattern you can’t ignore.


---

The problem? We've gotten really good at building resilient systems.


But we haven't built resilient people.
We just expect them to be.


Your company has:

• Backup servers for when technology fails.
• Contingency plans for when deals fall through.
• Redundancy built into every critical function.
 
 
But what happens when your CFO's nervous system hits capacity?

We just expect that they'll push through.


And that's where we're failing.

If you're a dysregulated leader, admit it or not, you quickly become the weakest link in the organization.


When your system is in survival mode, 
you can't access your full capacity.

• Your decision-making slows.
• Your ability to read the room deteriorates.
• The nuance you normally hold disappears.


And no framework can compensate for that.


We treat leadership capacity like it's fixed.
Like some people just have it and others don't.

But capacity isn't fixed.

It's regulated.

BIG difference.

When will organizations finally admit it?


---

What if I told you, you get exhausted more from self-editing than from your workload?


For years I was mixed up in identities I thought were incompatible:

  • the investor who speaks the language of boardrooms
  • the mother of three who sings lullabies in four languages
  • the Eastern-European-raised, Belgium-shaped, Mexico-connected human

And the wild thing?

𝘕𝘰𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘺 𝘢𝘴𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘱𝘭𝘪𝘵 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧.
I did that on my own. 
(𝘞𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘥𝘰, 𝘶𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘤𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺)

Trying to be professional/ credible/ the one who can handle it.

Every time I walked into work,
some part of me stayed outside - waiting.


That’s what burnout actually feels like.

(I'll drop peer-reviewed research on this in the comments)

𝘐𝘵 𝘪𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘦𝘹𝘩𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯. 𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯.

Performing a version of yourself while the real one waits behind the curtain hoping you’ll notice her again.


I notice a similar thing with executives.

You think you’re overwhelmed by workload.
But it’s the identity management -  "Don't be too emotional/ too foreign/ too tired.."
that quietly drains you.


So here’s my imperfect invitation:

#BringYourWholeSelfToWork

Bring the contradictions.
Bring the languages/ history/ humour.
And the parts you’ve been hiding because someone, somewhere, taught you they were “too much.”

The world needs more humans that feel "integrated" (wholesome?  you choose the word to describe it).

Happy Monday, btw,

If a part of you softened or stepped forward while reading this, let it have a voice.

You can name it here - I’ll meet it with respect.


---

Many people are doing it, but aren't comfortable admitting it,


Therapy.

We feel strong resistance to it, especially executives.  Yes, I did too, big time.


I used to think therapy meant someone would analyse me, tell me what was "wrong" with me. That felt unbearable, even when I needed help.


Let's get on the same page:

The therapy world has changed big time. 

In the past 20 years, approaches like Internal Family Systems, Somatic Experiencing, and other systemic modalities have shifted mental care  𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘪𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘶𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘪𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨.

(that’s why I trained in this - it's what actually helps executives perform at the top without burning out)


These approaches see your reactions as 𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘦𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘪𝘴𝘮𝘴 your system developed to keep you functioning.


This feels better, no?

When you learn to meet those protective mechanisms gently, with support from someone trained to navigate them - 

The excess defensive energy finally releases, and you feel safe to show up as you are, reducing emotional labour load and risk of burnout.

(Is that what we call “feeling well in your own skin”? or what's your version?)


Anyway, food for thought before the weekend.


And yeah, there is no gene of mental disorders, some of us just had to build a thicker skin.



---

Part of me is in awe that I can be this raw and honest about self-worth, career shifts, leadership and parenting - especially on LinkedIn.

Hope you enjoy it - and your reflections are welcome.

Thank you, Ulrike, for inviting the conversation where depth feels safe.

❯❯ Your Content Therapist ❯ Founder of Visible[Focus] ❯ For solopreneurs and founders ready to turn their story into an authentic voice with content that attracts clients & creates opportunities ❯ YouTube & LinkedIn

Join me for a conversation with Elena Shirokaya on practical nervous system tools to build calm, clarity, and composure under pressure. We’ll explore how to spot subtle signs of strain, regulate in real time, and shift from survival mode to truly thriving. Tune in for simple, actionable strategies you can use right away.

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