The Caring Techie

For more information visit irinastanescu.com

Founder & CEO - Leadership Coach

Maven

For more information - maven.com/irina-stanescu/influence-swe

Course Instructor - "Impact through Influence in Engineering Teams"

Mnemonic, Inc

• First FT hire
• Bootstrapped the engineering culture and processes
• Partnered with the CEO and Head of Product to prioritize and manage our roadmap
• Delivered key 0 to 1 projects including indexing, data processing, APIs, and billing

Staff Software Engineer / Engineering Manager

Uber

Feb 2018 - July 2020 Uber Eats - Eater Delivery Experience team
• Led the redesign of the entire delivery experience in the Uber Eats Eater app - project Genie
• Architected a server-driven model-view framework for the delivery experience that provides support for various delivery modalities (over-the-top, pick-up, restaurants providing their couriers)
• Led the cross-organizational effort of integrating maps in the Eater App

Jan 2017 - Feb 2018 Uber Ride Sharing - Marketplace Management
• Led the team that built an event ingestion platform and API to be used for the purpose of Forecasting & Pricing

Staff Software Engineer (former Senior 2) - Tech Lead

Google

Led a cross-organizational team to architect & implement a scalable, server-side dynamic ad insertion engine for MPEG-DASH Linear TV and On-Demand streams for the Google Fiber Mobile TV App (Android and iOS).

Senior Software Engineer - Technical Lead Manager

Google Fiber TV Ads
Developed the distributed backend for dynamic ad insertion on linear TV for Google Fiber Set Top Boxes for serving fully targeted TV ads to Google Fiber customers

Google Fiber Embedded
Developed and troubleshooted embedded software for the in-home routing devices and set top boxes.

AdWords Serving Infrastructure
Features and fixes for live budgeting, experiments and local ad serving.

Software Engineer

Ixia

Developed plug-ins for the IxNetwork product including MLD and IGMP implementations, DHCP server features, and performance improvements.

University POLITEHNICA of Bucharest

Operating Systems Teaching Assistant

Voice System, Romania

Bitdefender

Junior Software Developer (Intern)

I’m an Engineering Leader with 14+yrs of hands-on industry experience in a variety of domains ranging from networking, embedded software, ad serving, video streaming, marketplaces, transportation, food delivery to web 3 / blockchain.

I also write about Leadership, Humans & Technology at thecaringtechie.com

I'm incredibly passionate about coaching and leadership and take great pleasure in helping people achieve their goals. Let me support you in your growth journey so you can transform into the best versions of yourself both professionally and personally.

My software engineering career skyrocketed after I learned to advocate in my own best interest. And so can yours. But what does that really mean?

Here are some examples:
- Do you want to be assigned to work on a project? Ask for it. Communicate why.
- Do you not want to work on a project? Say it to your manager.
- Do you want to get promoted? Ask for it.
- Do you want a raise or different benefits? Ask for it.
- Do you want people to know what you’re good at? Tell them. Show them.
- Will your life be easier if a certain change is implemented? Make a case for it. Get buy-in.

Self-advocacy is a must-have skill for anyone looking to grow. If you want your contributions to be recognized and valued, you need to be able to self-advocate.

Learning to self-advocate is like hiring your own personal cheerleader and career champion. Why wouldn’t you want that?

Self-advocacy brought me the tech lead title, a promotion from Eng2 to senior in under a year, the manager role, and much more.

If I could do it, so can you.

#softwareengineering #leadership

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Irina Stanescu

Founder @ The Caring Techie | Engineering Leader | Teaching “Impact Through Influence” on Maven | ex-Google, ex-Uber

What are some tips for effective self-advocacy?

When I was at Google, my very first promotion from Eng 1 to Eng 2 got rejected. I remember the day I found out about it as if it were yesterday: my manager telling me that the promo committee feedback was to “work on more impactful projects”.

I was crushed! How could that be? I delivered everything I was asked to.

Little did I know that it would end up being one of the biggest lessons of my career, for which I’m very grateful now. That rejection was a blessing in disguise.

What is the lesson? “I’ll just do what I’m told and I’ll get promoted” is simply not true. I needed to take more control over the process, relying less on my manager.

Is it unfortunate and perhaps unfair? Debatable, leaning towards yes.
Am I grateful for this early lesson? Absolutely—1000%.
Did it serve me well? Without a doubt.

Here are some of the things I did differently afterward:
• I independently researched what’s expected at the next level
• I reached out for advice from other senior folks in the org and unintentionally found a mentor
• I started relying less on my manager and self-managed more 
• I asked for a larger scope project that I could deliver end to end and tried to work on fewer snack tasks

The results: I not only got to Eng 2 6 months later but also senior another year after.

Read the story and full list of learnings here: https://lnkd.in/gXYVXC9B

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🤝 I help engineers and leaders become high performers in high-pressure tech careers, dm me “CONNECT” to learn more

#softwareengineering #coding

10 “famous last words” in software engineering that took me more than a decade to learn. Use at your own risk.

"𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝗶𝘁 𝗯𝗲?"
This is often said before starting a task, which almost always ends up being more complex than first expected.

“𝗜𝘁 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱𝗻'𝘁 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝗻 𝗵𝗮𝗹𝗳 𝗮 𝗱𝗮𝘆”
Same as the previous one, whatever we think takes half a day almost always takes more than that. Probably even more than a day.

"𝗜'𝗹𝗹 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗰𝗼𝗱𝗲..."
You make this one small line of code change and next thing you know none of the tests are passing anymore and you spend hours trying to understand why (and that’s in the optimistic case tests actually catch this change).

"𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗯𝗲 𝗮 𝗾𝘂𝗶𝗰𝗸 𝗳𝗶𝘅"
Even small bugs can become an unexpected pandora box of issues that are anything but easy to fix.

"𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗮 𝘁𝗲𝗺𝗽𝗼𝗿𝗮𝗿𝘆 𝗳𝗶𝘅"
When we say that, we often mean we'll keep the change for a few weeks, but then weeks turn into months that turn into years, and the solution becomes a permanent part of the codebase (with a comment above saying “DO NOT TOUCH THIS”).

"𝗪𝗲'𝗹𝗹 𝗿𝗲𝗳𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗿"
And that later never comes, leading to more and more tech debt.

“𝗟𝗲𝘁'𝘀 𝗿𝗲-𝘄𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁. 𝗜𝘁 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝘆 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗮 𝗳𝗲𝘄 𝗱𝗮𝘆𝘀.” 
Quick refactorings are rarely that quick.

"𝗜𝘁'𝘀 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗮 𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗼𝗿 𝘂𝗽𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗲, 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗴𝗼 𝘄𝗿𝗼𝗻𝗴?"
Then you do the update and the next thing you know it becomes a full-on incident.

“𝗜’𝗺 𝗮𝗹𝗺𝗼𝘀𝘁 𝗱𝗼𝗻𝗲”
I suffer from the curse of “almost done”, something unexpected always happens when I say it. Like the next quote 😊

“𝗪𝗲'𝗹𝗹 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗿𝗼𝗹𝗹 𝗶𝘁 𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸 𝗶𝗳 𝗮𝗻𝘆𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗴𝗼𝗲𝘀 𝘄𝗿𝗼𝗻𝗴" 
Optimistically underestimating the complexity of rolling back a deployment gone wrong.

What else would you add?

#softwareengineering #coding

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✍🏻 Check out www.thecaringtechie.com

Founder @ The Caring Techie | Engineering Leader | Teaching “Impact Through Influence” on Maven | Former Tech Lead ex-Google, ex-Uber

There is a big difference between being direct and being a jerk. Here’s how you differentiate the two.

Being direct:
- Communicates straightforwardly, doesn’t sugar coat or add fluff
- Focuses on efficiency and conciseness
- Holds people accountable
- Respects the listener
- Has no intention to harm or belittle
- Is often solution-oriented

Being a jerk:
- Often disregards other people’s feelings
- May use directness as a cover for rudeness (”I’m just blunt, that’s my personality”)
- Finger points and blames
- Lacks empathy or consideration for how the message is received
- Intent may be to belittle, dominate, or provoke rather than to communicate effectively
- Is not solution-oriented

So next time you’re tempted to label a coworker a jerk, consider this list. Remember, directness only makes people jerk if it deviates from the facts if it hurts or belittles, and if it’s not constructive.

Have you ever worked with direct people who weren’t jerks? What about jerks who were direct? How would you differentiate the two?

Interviewing is one of the most stressful experiences. I’ve interviewed hundreds of software engineering candidates in the last 14 years and the stress was palpable. Here are 5 things you can do to help candidates overcome interview anxiety.

1. Build rapport
   “I’ve noticed … in your resume and I found it very impressive. Can you tell me more about it?”
   
2. Show empathy
   “I’ve been in your shoes and I know this is a lot. But you can overcome the stress.”
   
3. Deep breathing
   “First let's pause. Let’s take a deep breath. Okay, now let's think through this together.”
   
4. Reorient from binary answers to having a discussion
   “My goal here isn’t to see if you know the answer, I want to see how you’re thinking about the problem.” 
   
5. Invite them to imagine they’re in a comfortable team setting
   “Think of me as your teammate right now and we’re brainstorming about this problem. What would you tell me?”

What else would you add?

#softwareengineering #interviewing #emotionalintelligence  

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I have zero respect for people being mean to strangers on the internet. It’s despicable and low. Don’t be this guy.

For context: On the left is their reply to my automatic “welcome to my newsletter” email. On the right is what I replied.

What I find extra disappointing is that this person works in leadership development, meanwhile, their behavior is so immature.

I said it and will say it again: How you do something is how you do everything. You can’t sometimes opt in and sometimes you opt out of  integrity, trustworthiness, and kindness. 

And as far as newsletters go, remember: when you sign up for some newsletters, you get to elect if you want to subscribe to the newsletters recommended by that person. If you don’t want those newsletters, simply skip them!!

“Why are we building this?” is a question that every software engineer from junior all the way to staff+ and beyond needs to embrace.

Just because your manager or tech lead assigns you work, it doesn’t mean they expect you to blindly execute without understanding the reason why. If they do expect that, consider it as a huge red flag. 

Good leaders don’t want blind following. 

So consider it part of your job to think, question, and get curious. Not simply to execute. Even if it takes a bit more time, seek to understand the reason and impact your work has, and keep your leaders accountable for providing this insight.

#softwareengineering #coding #leadership  

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🚀 I help engineers become high performers, dm "coach" to find out more.

Top 5 recent articles in tech to level up your skills:

1. Guide to managing up (https://lnkd.in/eb8aTGYf) - by Irina Stanescu

2. How to manage up as an engineer or manager (https://lnkd.in/eBigzJ6X) - by Gregor Ojstersek 

^ Both of these have great, practical advice on working better with your manager.

3. How to use your mentor effectively (https://lnkd.in/exmsm7j3) - by Raviraj Achar. Great advice on getting the most value from your mentor.

4. Side projects for career growth (https://lnkd.in/egjT7ri8) - by Nicola Ballotta. How to go about side projects that help career growth

5. The debuggers toolkit (https://lnkd.in/eBiXq5fA) - by Addy Osmani. Tips and tricks on debugging from one of the best in the industry! 

Finally, don't forget to check out the recent High Growth Engineer article to learn top tips on giving code review feedback: https://lnkd.in/ewmTQevp

Despite a rocky start as a software engineer at Google, I was able to compensate for 2.5 years of career stagnation with 2 promotions within one year, followed by becoming a Tech Lead. How did I do it? I took charge of my career and doubled down on my self-management skills.

In the workplace, self-management is one’s ability to solve problems independently, show self-awareness, and operate autonomously.

For optimal career growth, you still need to self-manage even if you have a manager. 

Managers don’t have the time or energy to handhold everyone. It’s not a scalable management strategy.

When you self-manage, you're not only lightening your manager's workload but you’re also positioning yourself to receive more strategic and high-level guidance.

That way, instead of discussing tactical things you can figure out on your own, you and your manager can spend your precious 1-1 time talking about where your career is heading, and how to get grow and get to the next level.

The skills needed to self-manage:
1/ You can manage your timelines and deliverables
2/ You can make decisions independently
3/ You find the drive within yourself to start and keep going
4/ You can deal with your emotions in stressful situations
5/ You handle most conflicts on your own without needing to escalate
6/ You don't need your manager to give constructive feedback to others
7/ You build and manage your stakeholders
8/ You own your career development

To read my story and learn more about how to build each of these skills, read my in-depth explainer: https://lnkd.in/dppGXpja

“Do you have any feedback for me?” is one of the most inefficient ways to ask for feedback. And yet we still do it. Here’s how to ask for feedback that will actually help you in 5 easy steps.

Step 1 - Pick your sources:
Expand your feedback horizons. Instead of only leaning on your manager or close peers, why not tap into the wealth of knowledge from others around you? Chat up people from different teams, those a few steps ahead career-wise, or cross-functional buddies you collaborate with. 

Step 2 - Set the stage:
Treat feedback like the gift it is—someone's taking their time to help you out, after all. Show some love and let them know how much you appreciate it. And hey, don't ambush them. Give a heads up that you're looking for feedback, but let them take their time to think it over. 

Step 3 - Formulate your request:
Be clear and straight to the point about what you're looking for feedback on. Whether it's a presentation, an email, or how you handled a situation, asking specific questions like "What about X did you think was Y?" can help zero in on what you really want to know. And don’t drag your feet; ask while the details are still fresh.

Step 4 - Reflect and process:
Keep an open mind. Feedback might sting a bit if it's pointing out where you can do better, but it's all about growing. Take your time to think it over, and if something isn't clear, just reach out again. It's all part of the process.

Step 5 - Close the loop:
 Let folks know you’re actually using their advice. When you circle back and tell them how you've applied their feedback, it shows you’re not just listening but acting on it. It makes them feel part of your journey and more likely to help you out again in the future.

What else would you add?

For a limited time only, I removed the paywall from my in-depth article on this topic: https://lnkd.in/gPipg9dn

#softwareengineering #leadership #feedback

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To be effective as a software engineer or engineering manager, you hear the advice to build trust with your leaders and your team. I disagree. My advice is: don’t build trust, be trustworthy instead.

The difference is subtle but relevant.

When you are trustworthy, you focus inwards: on yourself and your behaviors. It’s a much more scalable and authentic approach.

You are trustworthy even when nobody is watching. You don’t need other people to be someone who deserves trust. 

So what are behaviors that make you trustworthy:

- You don’t share information that was shared with you in confidentiality
- You communicate transparently, even the not-so-good news
- You can communicate and honor your boundaries
- You take responsibility for your mistakes
- You follow through with your promises

What else did I miss?

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🤝 I coach engineers and leaders to grow in their careers, dm me “CONNECT” to learn more

Want to level up your tech career in 60 mins?

Join Irina Stanescu and me for an insightful conversation about "Increase Your Impact as an Engineer by Facilitating Team Decisions"! 🚀

Irina and I have been leveraging the power of enabling our teams to build successful careers in tech over the past 10 years and we will share all about it in this event.

Join us if you want to:

▶️ Discover how mastering facilitation can transform you from a skilled engineer to a force multiplier by guiding your team through complex decision-making processes effectively

▶️ Learn techniques that not only encourage collaboration and support healthy conflict but also use these conflicts as learning opportunities

▶️ Amplify your impact by empowering others – create a meeting culture where every voice is heard and valued, making your discussions more efficient and less painful

Join us live and ask us all your questions ❓

Looking forward to seeing you there and helping you transform your role within your tech team! 🙂

#tech #leadership #softwareengineering 

If you’re a software engineer or engineering manager wanting a great working relationship with your manager, start by asking yourself “What are my manager's needs, goals, and working style, and how can I support them?”.

This question is fundamental for “managing up”, helping your manager help you, and building a symbiotic partnership that benefits both of you.

Here are 6 unspoken needs your manager probably has and how to meet them:

1. Clarity (about yourself) ⇒ yourself such as your short-term and long-term goals, areas you want to grow in, your POVs (points of view), and —yes you hear me right— your struggles.
   
2. Information ⇒ Managing up is all about funneling the right information up to your manager (Think progress updates, heads-ups, and FYIs)
   
3. Feedback ⇒ Your concerns and feedback matter. Make sure your manager knows about it. Don’t forget to tell your manager what they do well.
   
4. Solutions and Initiative ⇒ Flagging issues is a helpful habit, but what could truly make your manager's day is if you also bring solutions to the table, or at the very least, show initiative in tackling the issues head-on.
   
5. Support ⇒ Yes, your manager needs you to support them too. Figure out how to support your manager: directly (by asking) or indirectly (by observing and confirming).
   
6. Time ⇒ no manager has enough time in the working day. The more you can save them time by being concise and proactive the better.

To go deeper + see practical examples of how to achieve them, head over to: 
https://lnkd.in/gcycwQnb

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thecaringtechie.com • 7 min read

Managing Up (Irina’s Version): How to Meet The Unspoken Needs of Your Manager

Open article: Managing Up (Irina’s Version): How to Meet The Unspoken Needs of Your Manager by thecaringtechie.com • 7 min read

When I first became a Tech Lead at Google, I was all in—planned my first project and started telling people what to do left and right, thinking my newfound authority would make them listen. Spoiler alert: it didn’t work like that. 👇

As a Tech Lead, I couldn’t hire, fire, and decide people’s performance scores and bonuses. I had no 𝗽𝗼𝘀𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗽𝗼𝘄𝗲𝗿.

The only power I had was my 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗽𝗼𝘄𝗲𝗿, which was built over time with my expertise and reputation.

Even when I got positional power as a Tech Lead Manager, I still couldn’t simply tell people what to do and expect them to wholeheartedly comply. Sure, they’ll do what I ask, but they might also become secretly resentful.

With or without positional authority, to be effective and make people voluntarily listen to me and be excited about it, 𝗜 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗻 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗻𝗳𝗹𝘂𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺.

After 14 years in the industry, I believe influencing without authority to be a vital skill:
• If you want to get anything done
• If you want to move fast
• If you have ideas and want to make them a reality
• If you want to find a larger scope
• If you aspire to any senior management role or even the C-suite

To learn more about how to influence and become influential at work, join the 4th cohort of my course “Impact through Influence in Engineering Teams” which just opened up for enrollment! 

Use code EARLYBIRD for the next 48 hours only and register here: https://lnkd.in/gimXVjmY

#softwareengineering #leadership

Here were 5 of my favorite recent articles in tech to take action on and see results:

1. How to recognize the potential in engineers by Gregor Ojstersek (https://lnkd.in/eHcidVXr) -- Learn the traits and activities that increase your potential

2. How to focus on force multiplying activities and remember what you did by Caleb Mellas (https://lnkd.in/eaavBq9Z) -- Why you forget what you did during the week and how to fix it while making more impact

3. How we set a technical direction that stuck on Plato Newsletter by Chief Architect Andrew McVeigh (https://lnkd.in/eKbcN_4H) -- Learn how to shape an engineering strategy and get buy-in

4. [Paid article] Managing higher (with your skip manager) by Irina Stanescu (https://lnkd.in/ea9TRFhG) -- Learn how to communicate best with your skip-level manager and why it's important to get it right

5. How I engineered effective meetings by Francisco Manuel Soto Ramírez (https://lnkd.in/eTe9g_jU) -- Learn to run meetings better

A lot of "How" articles with actionable tips on mindset, activity tracking, setting tech direction, managing up, and meetings.

Let me know what good ones I missed or which one of these was your favorite!

--
P.S. If you're interested, check out the recent High Growth Engineer article on saving time with these easy but high impact tips for your terminal: https://lnkd.in/e3Vbx6SX. The comments have some awesome tips as well!

I had the pleasure of meeting with Irina Stanescu today, and I was blown away by how humble and approachable she is! 

We talked about navigating the industry as women in tech and the challenges and joys of content creation. I left the conversation feeling inspired and energized.

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