💡What if your next promotion didn’t come from working harder; but from being seen differently?

I help Tech professionals go from being “too technical to lead” to trusted, influential, fulfilled leaders. 

🧠 Backed by neuroscience, psychology, and real-world experience, I blend inner clarity with high-performance strategies

What I Help You Do:
→ Build visibility, influence & strategic presence
→ Reframe imposter syndrome into intentional confidence
→ Communicate like a leader, not just an expert
→ Break through the performance trap & lead on your terms

Why Work With Me?
• 15+ years in Tech (Salesforce, HP, Pre-Sales & Leadership)
• MSc in Psychology & Neuroscience (King’s College London)
• Certified Executive Coach (ICF ACC + Barefoot Coaching + NLP Practitioner)
• Search Inside Yourself (Google-born Mindfulness Leadership)
• Trained to 'Teach' meditation directly by Jack Kornfield and Tara Brach
• 10x Marathoner — I coach what I’ve lived

🎯 Currently accepting coaching partnerships for high-performing tech professionals
📩 DM me or visit www.stephenbaines.coach

Your leadership isn’t about doing more
It’s about becoming more of who you already are

Everyone thinks burnout is about work-life balance
... They're solving the wrong problem

THE BURNOUT ICEBERG:

What people see:
• Long hours
• Looking exhausted  
• Missing lunch breaks

What actually prevents burnout:
• A great leader who trusts you
• Mindful awareness of your thoughts and emotions
• Having actual fun at work
• Strong wellness habits as foundation
• Growth prospects that excite you
• Constructive feedback that helps
• Continual learning opportunities
• Passion and purpose in your work
• Flexibility to work your way

The list goes on...

The reality is:
⛔ You can't yoga your way out of a toxic boss
⛔ You can't meditate away micromanagement
⛔ You can't vacation from a dead-end role

Burnout isn't about YOU being weak
It's about CONDITIONS being wrong

THE 30-DAY FIX:

⚡ Week 1: Find one thing that gives you energy. Do more of it
⛔ Week 2: Set one boundary. Hold it
📈 Week 3: Start one conversation about growth
🚀 Week 4: Make one change. Track the difference

Small shifts compound

If you feel alive on Sunday but dead by Tuesday, the math is clear:

Stop fixing yourself
Start changing conditions

💬 What actually prevents YOUR burnout?

♻️ Share with someone who needs this permission

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for truth about thriving at work

Stephen Baines

Building Influential Tech Leaders | Coaching Psychologist | Favikon #1 UK Meditation & Mindfulness | Salesforce Leader

70% of resignations have nothing to do with money
The real reason?

Leaders who don't say "thank you"
... AND mean it!

Properly. Specifically. Publicly

Appreciation isn't a nice-to-have
It's how humans are wired to perform

The neuroscience is clear:
Recognition triggers the same brain regions as financial reward

But here's what most leaders do instead:
⛔ 1:1s focused on operations
⛔ Generic praise
⛔ Pizza Fridays

Meanwhile the top performers hasn't heard their name in 6 months

💬 When did someone last appreciate YOUR specific contribution?

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for leadership psychology that works
Also grab my newsletter for weekly strategies to grow as leaders https://lnkd.in/ejtfPG9J

"Remote workers are lazy"

Really?

Office workers THINK we're:
☕ Sipping coffee all day
📺 Netflix between emails
🛋️ Taking afternoon naps
📵 Ghosting our teams

Remote workers ACTUALLY:
🌍 Lead global teams at 8AM
⚡ Get 5 hours deep work (office gets 2)
📊 Own outcomes, not face-time
🎯 Deliver without supervision
🧩 Problem Solve without adhoc chats
🧭 Lead without visibility

For me, its quite obvious with the research also backing it up:
• 76% report higher productivity (Gallup)
• 90% maintain or improve quality
• 45% fewer wasted meetings

IMO, the pushback on remote is twofold:
🏢 Real-estate utilisation (back-scratching)
😱 Leaders who don't know how to lead remote teams

The fact is, remote work doesn't create lazy workers
It reveals who's been carrying the team all along

The office HIDES mediocrity
Remote EXPOSES excellence

No wonder managers want you back
Your performance makes them look bad

💬 Office or remote... where do you actually deliver?

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for truth about modern work

I spent 10 years thinking top performers were the ones grinding hardest

Then I started coaching them

What I discovered changed everything about how I work:

THE GRINDER MYTH:

We've been sold a lie...
That suffering = success
That exhaustion = excellence
That 80-hour weeks = top performance

The data tells a different story

After analysing 200+ top performers, here's what IMO actually separates the top performers from everyone else:

They're not grinding
They're architecting

THE 15 TRAITS NOBODY TALKS ABOUT:

Look at the image. Really look at it

Notice what's missing?
• No "first in, last out"
• No "always available"  
• No "hustle 24/7"
• No "sleep when you're dead"

Because top performers learned what grinders haven't:

Your best work happens in the margins
Your breakthroughs come from boredom
Your edge comes from energy, not exhaustion

THE NEUROSCIENCE TRUTH:

Stanford research shows:
• Productivity per hour drops sharply after 50 hours/week
• After 55 hours, productivity drops so much that extra hours are pointless
• Those working 70 hours produce limited value than those working 55 hours

Multiple studies confirm: extended hours lead to fatigue, errors, and diminished cognitive function

Grinders are literally working against their biology!

THE UNCOMFORTABLE REALITY:

That person working weekends? Not getting promoted
The one answering emails at midnight? Plateauing
The "always on" hero? Heading for burnout

Meanwhile, top performers are:
→ Leaving at 5pm (guilt-free)
→ Saying no to 80% of requests
→ Taking real vacations
→ Working on side projects

They are protecting their energy like it's currency

Because it is

THE PATTERN I SEE EVERYWHERE:

Grinders focus on input (hours worked)
Top performers focus on output (value created)

Grinders maximise effort
Top performers maximise leverage

Grinders follow all the rules
Top performers write their own

THE CAREER TRUTH:

Your company doesn't want another grinder
They have plenty

They want someone who can:
• Think clearly under pressure
• Spot patterns others miss
• Challenge broken systems
• Deliver 10x results with 1x effort

You can't do that on 4 hours of sleep

Look at the image again

Which traits made you uncomfortable?
Those are probably the ones holding you back

💬 What "lazy" habit actually makes you more effective?

♻️ Share this with someone who needs permission to stop grinding

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for psychology-backed performance insights

15 Signs You’re Already A Great Leader
(even without the title)

The signs are obvious when pointed out to us. See below:

1. People seek your input (when you're not even their boss)
2. You steady yourself first (before helping others panic)
3. You create clarity (when everyone else is confused)
4. You give credit, take blame (without being asked)
5. You protect focus (by saying "no" for the team)
6. You coach, not control (people grow around you)
7. You translate chaos (into simple next steps)
8. You fix unowned problems (because someone has to)
9. You set standards silently (others just follow)
10. You're copied (your habits become team habits)
11. You decide the unspoken (when no one else will)
12. You decide with context (not just data)
13. You keep promises (even tiny ones)
14. You learn in public (admitting what you don't know)
15. You speak for the silent (giving voice to the quiet)

You might think you need:
⛔ A title
⛔ Direct reports  
⛔ Authority

But you're already:
✅ Setting standards
✅ Building trust
✅ Creating clarity
✅ Influencing outcomes

You're not preparing to lead
You're already leading

The only question:
Will you own it?

QUICK TEST:
5+ signs = Leading informally
10+ signs = Ready for the title
13+ signs = Probably underpaid

💬 How many signs? (Be honest)

♻️ Tag someone who doesn't know they're already leading

➕ And drop me a follow for more psychology of leadership gems

"Just practice self-care!"
"Set better boundaries!"
"Try meditation!"

Hmm... This is victim-blaming

Most people think burnout is about working too much
They're solving the wrong problem

THE BURNOUT ICEBERG:

What people see:
• Long hours
• Looking exhausted
• Poor wellness habits

What's actually killing you:
• Micromanagement crushing your soul
• Bias keeping you invisible
• Zero growth for 3 years
• Toxic culture you can't escape
• No psychological safety to speak up
• 24/7 demands with no flexibility
• Poor feedback that destroys confidence
• Lack of purpose in meaningless work

The reality is...
⛔ That meditation app won't fix your toxic leader
⛔ That vacation won't cure being excluded
⛔ That gym membership won't solve micromanagement

You're not burned out because you're weak
You're burned out because the conditions are broken

THE REALITY CHECK:

If you feel alive on Sunday but dead by Tuesday?
That's not a YOU problem
That's a THEM problem

Stop trying to fix yourself
Start recognising what's actually broken

Your exhaustion isn't personal failure
It's the environmental you find yourself in

💬 Which have you noticed might be sapping your energy?

♻️ Share for others who may be struggling with burnout

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for truth about the psychology of the workplace

The most undervalued thing you can do to grow your career?


Kindness!

People might forget your code
They will forget your presentations
They certainly will forget your metrics

But they will NEVER forget how you made them feel

Here's 10 simple acts of kindness that cost nothing but change everything:

✅ Be the mentor you needed at their stage
✅ Open source your knowledge
✅ Protect their cherished time - that Slack can wait till Monday
✅ So the awkward thing that will make someones life easier
✅ Give verbal constructive feedback, often
✅ "Emma's role in the demo was instrumental" - share the credit
✅ Share your f*ck-ups - it normalises theirs
✅ Notice the wins, not just the misses
✅ Defend the 'human deadlines' (e.g. their child's nativity)
✅ Jump in when they're drowning, not when it's convenient

There is science behind this too...

Acts of kindness release oxytocin
Creates trust at a chemical level
Makes teams significantly more effective

Kindness isn't soft
It's strategic

Because everyone's fighting something you can't see

💬 What act of kindness changed your career trajectory?

♻️ Share with someone who makes work more human

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for leadership psychology that works

If people come to you with problems they could Google...
You're already leading

We've been conditioned to believe leadership looks like:
• A title on LinkedIn
• Direct reports on an org chart
• Authority to make decisions

Meanwhile, actual leaders are hiding in plain sight

Just look at the image...

Every single sign?
I see them in people I coach who swear they're "not ready" for leadership

The Problem Solver who fixes what nobody owns
The Unofficial Mentor everyone comes to for real talk
The Meeting Magnet invited for thinking, not title
The Conflict Calmer who brings peace to chaos

You know what these people all have in common?

They THINK they need permission to lead

The thing is, your brain is already wired for influence:
• Mirror neurons see others 'copy your calm'
• Emotional contagion spreads your standards
• Social proof amplifies your quiet actions

You're literally leading at a neurological level
Without a single direct report

There is a pattern I see CONSTANTLY:

Client: "I want to be a leader"
Me: "Tell me about your typical week"

*20 minutes later*

Me: "So you mentor 3 people, solve cross-team problems, and everyone asks your opinion?"
Client: "Yeah but that's not leadership"

That's EXACTLY leadership!

It's just most people WAIT. But real leaders don't wait for titles
They don't need permission
They don't announce their leadership

They just... lead

While you're waiting for someone to promote you, you're already:
→ Setting standards others follow
→ Creating clarity in confusion
→ Building trust without trying
→ Influencing without authority

Most are curious though, why don't they see it in themselves?

Simple. Because real leadership is invisible to the leader

You think you're "just helping"
They think you're indispensable

You think you're "just speaking up"
They think you're visionary

You think you're "just being yourself"
They think you're exactly what's needed

THE WAKE-UP CALL:

If people seek your input unprompted...
If you steady yourself before helping others...
If you create clarity from chaos...
If you give credit while taking blame...

You're not preparing to lead
You're already leading

The only question is:
Will you own it?

YOUR LEADERSHIP AUDIT:

Count how many of the 15 signs apply to you...

5+? You're leading informally
10+? You're ready for formal leadership
13+? You're probably under-titled

The gap isn't in your ability
It's in your awareness

💬 Which "silent sign" surprised you most about yourself?

♻️ Share this with someone who doesn't realise they're already leading

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for psychology insights that reveal your hidden leadership

Your imposter syndrome isn't real
It's just one of these 10 brain glitches

Look at this image

These aren't personality traits. They're bugs in your mental software

...And they're destroying your career

THE BRUTAL TRUTH:

In my Masters in Psychology and Neuroscience, I spent 2 years learning what this chart shows in 30 seconds

Every "I'm not good enough" thought?
That's not reality. That's **Labelling**

Every "They must think I'm incompetent"?
That's not insight. That's **Mind Reading**

Every "I should be further along by now"?
That's not motivation. That's a **Should Statement** killing your confidence

Here's what my coaching experience taught me:

High performers AREN'T positive thinkers
... They're accurate thinkers

You see, your brain evolved to keep you alive, not happy
It sees threats everywhere. Even in that Slack message

Cognitive distortions? They're your brain's way of keeping you "safe"
Done by keeping you small

I see daily patterns in my coaching and teams

🔴 **Catastrophising:** "This bug will lose us the deal"
Reality: It's Tuesday. You'll fix it by lunch

🔴 **Black-and-White:** "I'm either perfect or worthless"
Reality: You're human. Both brilliant and flawed

🔴 **Personalisation:** "The team failed because of me"
Reality: Systems fail. Not individuals

We need to reframe how we talk to ourselves

Stop asking: "Why do I think this way?"
Start asking: "Is this thought useful?"

Not positive. Not negative
Useful

Because your brain will always distort reality
The question is: Will you believe it?

Right now, you're probably thinking one of these:
• "This doesn't apply to me" (Black-and-White)
• "Everyone will judge me if I admit this" (Mind Reading)
• "I should have fixed this by now" (Should Statement)

See? Your brain just did it again

The difference between those who succeed and those who struggle?

Self-Awareness

Not perfection. Not positivity
Just catching your brain in the act

💬 Which distortion is your brain's favourite lie?

♻️ Share this with someone whose brain needs debugging

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for psychology that actually helps

I've coached 200+ high performers. The promoted ones are rarely the best. They're the most visible

A few months ago, I coached someone through their THIRD promotion rejection

Same feedback every time:
"Needs to be more visible"
"Should showcase outputs more"
"We don't see enough leadership"

Meanwhile, this person:
• Was THE go-to product expert
• Led the UK representation of the innovation council for EMEA
• Won >£2m of business last year
• Works magic in C-Suite demos

But they're not loud about it
So they're invisible

THE PERFORMANCE ICEBERG:

What Leaders See (The 10%):
📢 Speaks up in meetings
🏢 Present in the office
📊 Vocal about their outcomes
✉️ CCs everyone
👔 "Executive presence"

Your Actual Value (The 90%):
🛡️ Problem prevention
👥 Mentoring others
🏗️ System building
💡 Continuous innovation
🚀 Challenging status quo
📈 Proactive action
🌱 Growth mindset

Here's the brutal truth:

Every quiet genius who stays invisible costs themselves £50,000

How?
• Passed over for promotion: -£20,000
• Watching louder peers advance: -£15,000
• Undervalued bonus/raise: -£10,000
• Lost opportunities: -£5,000

Annual career cost: £50,000 minimum

THE PSYCHOLOGY TRAP:

You think: "My work speaks for itself"
Reality: Your work is mute

You think: "Quality over quantity"
Reality: Invisible quality = zero value

You think: "I don't play politics"
Reality: Visibility isn't politics, it's survival

THE WAKE-UP CALL:

That person I coached?
After the third rejection, they had two choices:

1. Leave (competitor would have offered more)
2. Learn to surface their value

They chose option 2

Within 6 months:
• Started sharing impact updates
• Made their outputs more strategically visible
• Got promoted with 30% raise

Same work. Different visibility
Different outcome.

THE STRATEGIC SHIFT:

Stop thinking promotion is about:
❌ Working harder
❌ Delivering more
❌ Being patient
❌ Hoping they notice

Start thinking it's about:
✅ Working visibly
✅ Narrating impact
✅ Strategic presence
✅ Owning your narrative

THE UNCOMFORTABLE TRUTH:

Your manager isn't psychic
Your work isn't self-evident
Your value needs a voice

And if you're waiting for someone else to tell your story?
You'll be waiting at the same level
While the loud ones lap you

Every year you stay invisible
Is a £50,000 donation to your employer

Time to stop being generous

💬 Quiet achievers: What's stopping you from making your impact visible?

♻️ Share this with the brilliant person who needs to be louder about their brilliance

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for truth about getting promoted (not just deserving it)

People think remote work = 🍺 🐕 🧘‍♀️ 📺 🏝️
They're wrong!

... It's killing OFFICE Culture!

Reality is, REMOTE is not...
📺 Netflix on in the background
🧺 A laundry cycle between meetings
☕ Fancy lattes in the kitchen
🐕 A dog in every Zoom call
🛀 Hot tubs whilst wiggling the mouse

For high performers, here's what it looks like:
✅ Fewer distractions
✅ More focused mornings
✅ Deep work without side chats
✅ Results over office optics
✅ Outside work balance

The research supports it too:
📊 McKinsey found remote teams waste 45% less time in meetings
📈 Gallup found remote workers are 31% more engaged than office workers
🎯 Owl Labs saw 90% of remote workers report higher productivity

Personally... I find the office distracting

Whilst side-conversations do promote innovation, the cost is deep-work

The reality for me is the following:
🏢 Office = meetings, distractions, commute, repeat
🏡 Remote = intention, autonomy, impact

Let's be clear though:
💡 The location doesn't make you productive
🧠 YOUR HABITS DO!

Location should be irrelevant

And the data supports this:
📈 McKinsey research shows hybrid workers report better focus, productivity, and work-life balance than office or remote workers

👇 Share in comments:
💪 Your best work environment
⏰ Daily focused hours
🏆 Biggest remote work win

➕ Follow me (Stephen Baines) for more on leadership, mindset & performance

7 corporate contradictions that make my coaching psychologist brain SCREAM

I've coached 200+ high performers...
The ones who quit?

It wasn't the workload
It was the LIES...

1️⃣ "We want your ideas!"
... but shoots down every suggestion in meetings

Your reality:
→ Spent weeks perfecting that proposal
→ "Let's stick with what works"
→ Watch CEO's nephew's half-baked idea get green lit

The Psychology: Learned helplessness. The best people stop trying

2️⃣ "Performance matters!"
... but they promote the golf buddy

Your reality:
→ Top performer 3 years running
→ That mediocre guy who drinks with VP? 
→ He's your new boss

The Truth: It's 20% performance, 80% politics

3️⃣ "Take ownership!"
... but they micromanage your font choice

Your reality:
→ "Own this end-to-end!"
→ 47 check-ins later...
→ Can't order a $20 cable without approval

The Joke: Accountability without authority

4️⃣ "Grow your skills!"
... but they keep you in same role for 5 years

Your reality:
→ "You're too valuable here"
→ 10th lateral "stretch opportunity"
→ New hire gets the promotion

The Trap: Excellence becomes your prison

5️⃣ "Speak up!"
... but then get pulled aside by your skip-level

Your reality:
→ Point out broken process
→ "That's not very collaborative"
→ Branded "not a team player"

The Lesson: They want agreement, not input

6️⃣ "Leadership potential!"
... but there is no path to get there

Your reality:
→ "Need leadership experience first"
→ "Can't get you a team without experience"
→ Infinite loop activated

The Scam: Catch-22 by design

7️⃣ "Work-life balance!"
... but you carry 3 people's workload

Your reality:
→ You cover for under-performers
→ "You're so capable!"
→ 70-hour weeks = "normal"

The reward for good work? More work

The reality is that these aren't accidents
They're features

Your options:
⚠️  Play the game (soul-crushing)
⚠️  Lower your standards (career suicide)  
✅ Find real leaders (unicorn hunting)
✅ Leave (scary but liberating)
✅ Become the leader you needed (power move)

After 15 years seeing these cycles in my career and clients...

The high performers who survive don't fight the system

They build their own

💬 Which lie have you been told in your career?

♻️ Share this with that high performer who's about to burn out

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for more psychology truths leaders don't want you to know

7 Things that Make My Coaching Psychologist Brain SCREAM!

Your years of experience are making you more valuable. But NOT how you think...

Look at these bananas

We hire the fresh ones. Some may avoid the spotted ones

Then wonder why our teams lack wisdom

Here's what coaching 200+ tech professionals taught me:

Fresh bananas make smoothies
Spotted bananas make banana bread

One is consumed quickly
One has depth and lasts

That 55-year-old architect that may seem "outdated"?
He's seen enough "revolutionary" frameworks die to know what actually endures

Nothing stays new forever. Not your skills. Not your edge. Not you

But humble enough to learn from every stage?

That's the only competitive advantage that compounds

💬 Are you chasing fresh or learning from spotted?

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for truth about lasting tech careers

Most people think they're great listeners
But they're stuck at level 2.

They nod
They wait their turn
They think they're engaged

But they're missing 80% of the conversation

The difference between good and great leaders?

They great ones master the art of real listening

THE 5 LEVELS OF LISTENING:

𝗟𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗹 1: 𝗪𝗮𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝗔𝘁𝘁𝗮𝗰𝗸
Listening for gaps to insert your point
Planning rebuttals while they speak
Missing everything that matters

𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 40% 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘦𝘤𝘩 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘧𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘴

𝗟𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗹 2: 𝗦𝘂𝗿𝗳𝗮𝗰𝗲 𝗦𝗰𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴
Catching keywords
Nodding appropriately
Zero emotional connection

𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 35%

𝗟𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗹 3: 𝗔𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗰𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴
Understanding context
Asking clarifying questions
Actually remembering what was said

𝘖𝘯𝘭𝘺 20% 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦

𝗟𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗹 4: 𝗥𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗥𝗼𝗼𝗺
Noticing body language shifts
Sensing emotional undercurrents
Hearing the hesitation before the "yes"

𝘔𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 4% 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴

𝗟𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗹 5: 𝗣𝗿𝗲𝗱𝗶𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗟𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴
Hearing what they're afraid to say
Understanding their real problem (not the presented one)
Knowing their next concern before they voice it

𝘛𝘩𝘦 1% 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘦𝘹𝘤𝘦𝘱𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴

Here's what changes at Level 5:

• You solve problems others don't see
• People trust you with real issues
• You prevent fires instead of fighting them
• Your 1:1s become transformational

THE NEUROSCIENCE:

Level 1-2: Activates YOUR speech centers
Level 3-4: Activates mirror neurons
Level 5: Full prefrontal cortex engagement

You're literally using different parts of your brain

Most leaders think listening is passive
It's the most active thing you can do

Want to test your level?

After your next conversation, write down:
- What they said
- What they meant
- What they didn't say

If you can't do all three, you're below Level 3

💬 What level are you honestly at?

♻️ Share with someone who needs to hear better

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for leadership psychology that works
... and grab my newsletter for weekly growth drops https://lnkd.in/ejtfPG9J

90% of feedback is toxic. Even when it's "positive"

Look at this image

Most tech professionals are stuck at Level 1. Silent Killers

Watching problems. Saying nothing
Not always out of intent though
Sometimes out of fear!

After coaching 200+ tech high performers, here's the patterns I see:

🤯 Bad feedback destroys careers
🪴 Good feedback changes them
🚀 Great feedback builds empires

But 90% of tech professionals give feedback that:
• Protects feelings over growth
• Focuses solely on the positive
• Is not constructive

In all those I've coached around feedback, its become a core pillar of not only their growth, but of those around them

Even if they aren't a formal leader themselves

This is 'leading without a title'

So the Five Levels... lets explore:

🔴 The Silent Killer: Has ideas. Chooses silence. Teams rot
🟡 The Sugar Coater: "Good job"... "Needs work". Useless
🟢 The Cheerleader: All praise, no growth. Feel-good poison
🔵 The Coach: Specific. Actionable. Actually useful
⚡ The Catalyst: Future-focused. Transforms thinking

Here's a flip on your likely perception of these...

Level 3 feels kind. It's actually cruel
Level 4 feels harsh. It's actually caring
Level 5 feels impossible. It's just rare

There is some neuroscience findings that supports this too:

😰 Vague feedback activates anxiety centers
🙋‍♂️ Specific feedback activates learning centers

By giving great feedback, you're literally rewiring their brain
... Or breaking it by not!

Most tech professionals THINK they're at Level 4
They're ACTUALLY at Level 2
Everyone else knows it

Want proof? 

Ask people in your team: "What's the most useful feedback you've gotten from me?"

Their silence will tell you everything

Or maybe they will give you Level 2 feedback too!

💬 What level is YOUR manager at? (Be honest)

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for leadership truths that promotes growth

There might just be more to life...

Two weeks ago I was at Disney World. We were told before we went that it would be a trip of a lifetime (Funny that as we look to book again 😂)

Throughout, I was mostly 'disconnected'

The first time in this way since my silent meditation retreat in 2019. SIX YEARS AGO!!

Anyway, this time? Coming back to "reality" hit different!

ONE MOMENT THAT CHANGED:

Standing in line for Space Mountain, my 6-year-old asked:
"Dad, why do grown-ups always look tired?"

I laughed. It was day 9 of hitting Disney parks every day. We were all knackered

But that question was on my mind for the rest of the trip. Because she was right

THE DISNEY DISCONNECT:

For 14 days, I lived in a bubble where the biggest decision was which ride next. Dinner conversations were about characters, not products. Success meant getting a FastPass or the awesome merch we'd snagged

It was a completely different world. And it made me realise how UTTERLY INSANE ours has become

THE RE-ENTRY SHOCK:

First day back:
- 784 unread emails
- 59 Slack DMs
- >100 Slack activities/notifications
- A calendar half-full with meetings

Honestly, I did sit and contemplate the thought of:
"What if I just... didn't?"

THE REALITY:

I reflected that we've created a world where:
• Being constantly available = being professional
• Having boundaries = lacking ambition
• Taking real breaks = falling behind
• Living fully = not taking work seriously

But Disney World taught me that the world doesn't end when you disconnect. If you play it right, the World might not even notice

Those "urgent" emails? Still there a week later. Some might disappear. 
Those "critical" decisions? Made themselves because they had to. 
Those "essential" meetings? Happened without me

Meanwhile, I was present for:
- My daughter riding Space Mountain 4 times. Guardians of the Galaxy twice
- Actual conversations with my partner and friends
- Fireworks displays without actually checking my phone
- Moments I'll absolutely remember forever

THE QUESTION THAT MATTERS:

When my daughter asked why grown-ups always look tired...

She wasn't asking about work-life balance. She was asking why we choose exhaustion over joy

Why we trade those magic moments for metrics. Why in some sense we might have forgotten how to play

Interesting what our children's innocence can teach us, right?

THE CHOICE:

I came back different. Not because Disney is magical. But because disconnecting showed me what we're really grinding for:

Moments, not metrics
Memories, not milestones
Presence, not productivity

Your kids won't remember your Q4 results will they? They'll remember if you were there

REALLY there

💬 When did you last fully disconnect? What did it teach you?

♻️ Share this if you need the reminder that the work will wait, but life won't

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for more on building a life, not just a career

Behind every "overnight success" in tech is a journey nobody sees

This is what my path REALLY looked like:
The wins that shaped me
The moments that nearly broke me
And why I wouldn't change a thing

Here's my journey

18 – Left home. Alone. BSc in Computing Science
19 – Broken leg. Surgery. Hit depression (best thing to happen!)
20 – Transformed life. Mindset. Prospects
21 – Graduated BSc in Computing Science
22 – Landed Consulting Role at HP
26 – Promoted 3 times in 4 years
27 – Earned my MBA. Distinction. Award-Winning Thesis

You would think my I would be loving life, right?

WRONG!

Same projects. Same challenges. I became jaded

28 – Burned out. Lost passion for tech
30 – HP Voluntary Lay-off. Joined Salesforce

I had joined the rocket ship of Salesforce. Passion re-ignited. In more ways than one...

32 – 'Search Inside Yourself' Teacher
33 – Promoted 2 times in 3 years at Salesforce
34 – ICF Coaching Certification

... but then it all fell apart. Or so it would seem

35 – Salesforce Lay-off

Fortunately, I landed an unexpected role in the Sales Engineering World. A shift in my work. A rekindling of my passion

36 – Mindfulness Meditation Teacher Training + BSc Psychology & Neuroscience
37 – Sales Engineering Leadership

... and now I find myself at this intersect

39 – Launching Human Edge OS & Coaching Executives

Now, some years I was flying
Some years I was drowning
But every setback taught me something the wins never could

Every "failure" was actually preparation:
• That broken leg at 19? Taught me resilience
• Burnout at 28? Led me to a new career
• Lay-offs at 30 & 35? Pushed me toward my real purpose
• Depression? Gave me empathy I use daily

You might be in your "broken leg" year right now
Or your "burnout" season
That doesn't mean you're failing
It means you're being prepared

Remember, success isn't about avoiding the valleys
It's about learning to see them differently

Your mess is your message
Your path is your power

Right now, someone needs to hear your story
The messy parts. The human parts. The real parts

Because they're sitting where you sat
Wondering if they'll make it

You're the proof they will

💬 What "setback" ended up being your setup for something better?

♻️ Share this with someone who needs to see that non-linear is normal

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for real talk about tech careers and human potential

15 years remote at Salesforce and HP taught me the brutal reality:

Remote work isn't the dream everyone sells you

It's harder. Lonelier. More demanding

Yet I'd still choose it EVERY single time

THE REALITY CHECK:

I burned out twice before learning these lessons
Passed over for promotions I deserved
Worked more hours than my office colleagues
Felt invisible despite crushing every metric

But here's what nobody tells you about remote work:

The struggle IS the strategy

THE BRUTAL TRUTHS I LEARNED:

🔴 You'll work MORE hours, not fewer
My first year remote: 7am-9pm almost daily
No commute became no boundaries
Until I learned: Your calendar is your contract

🟡 Promotions are 47% harder
Watched office peers get promoted over me
Despite better performance
The fix: Strategic visibility > Perfect metrics

🟢 Peak performance gets lonely
Crushing goals in silence hits different
No high-fives. No energy exchange
The solution: Build your own hype squad

🔵 "Flexible" means always on
APAC at 7am. US at 9pm
Async became 24/7
Until I created: Non-negotiable offline hours

THE UNCOMFORTABLE MIRROR:

After 15 years remote, here's what I know:

Remote work exposes who you really are
→ Self-driven or externally motivated?
→ Boundary setter or people pleaser?
→ Proactive communicator or passive hoper?

The office can hide these realities
Remote work can't

THE PAYOFF:

Why I'm still remote after 15 years:
• 3 hours daily not commuting = 780 hours/year
• Deep work without drive-by interruptions
• Designed my life, not defaulted to it
• Present for family moments that matter
• Results speak louder than face time

But only because I mastered the brutal realities first

YOUR REMOTE REALITY CHECK:

Swipe through the carousel for all 10 brutal truths →

Each one cost me something to learn
But together they built something better:

A career on my terms
Not theirs

💬 Which remote reality is hitting you hardest right now?

♻️ Share this with someone considering remote work (they need the truth)

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for psychology-backed remote leadership insights

10 Brutal Realities about Remote Work

You're not too busy. You're too comfortable...
...I proved it 8 times!

8 marathons. 6 years. The World Majors
While working at Salesforce. Raising kids. Doing a Masters. Training as a Meditation Teacher. Building a business

Look at this image

This is what breaking your own BS looks like:

Every World Major I ran, I improved performance

🏃‍♂️ Better training
🥗 More efficient nutrition
⏱️ Faster times (in all but Heatwave Boston)

I didn't do this because I'm athletic (I'm not)
I did it because I needed to teach my kids and clients this:

𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗳𝗼𝗿𝘁 𝗶𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗽𝗼𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗮𝗹 𝗴𝗼𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗱𝗶𝗲

Most people I coach see only the pain of growth. They miss what's on the other side

Growth is naturally painful. But pain is ALL they see

⛔ Its hard work taking that Masters degree
⛔ Its hard work going to the gym before work
⛔ Its hard work applying for jobs and interviewing
⛔ Its hard work starting that business
⛔ Its hard work leading people

What they don't see is that their next level is hiding behind the very thing they're avoiding

✅ That promotion you want? Behind a difficult conversation
✅ That skill you need? Behind boring practice
✅ That relationship you crave? Behind vulnerability
✅ That business you dream of? Behind the fear of failure

We think discomfort is the enemy
It's the doorway

Here's what marathons taught me about life:

Your brain lies about your limits
Says you're at 100% when you're at 30%

The gap between those two numbers?
That's where your life changes

The neuroscience backs this:
> Discomfort triggers neuroplasticity
> Your brain literally rewires under pressure
> You become who you're willing to suffer to become

Most people choose familiar pain over unfamiliar possibility

They'd rather stay stuck than feel uncomfortable for 6 months

Your choice:
✅ The discomfort of growth
⛔ Or the discomfort of regret

One is temporary
One is permanent

💬 What uncomfortable thing have you been avoiding?

♻️ Share with someone choosing comfort over growth

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for psychology that challenges comfort
... also go grab my free weekly newsletter too https://lnkd.in/ejtfPG9J

This statement blew me away
Mostly because I resonate so heavily!

After coaching 200+ professionals, here's the pattern:

The ones who think they're "behind"?
They're usually the ones about to breakthrough

Why?

🔎 𝗨𝗿𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗰𝘆 𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗲𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗰𝘂𝘀
🧠 𝗘𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗲𝘀 𝘄𝗶𝘀𝗱𝗼𝗺
🚀 𝗛𝘂𝗺𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗲𝘀 𝗴𝗿𝗼𝘄𝘁𝗵

But we're wired to believe the opposite

THE PSYCHOLOGY OF STARTING:

Your brain is lying to you about timing

It says:
❌ "Everyone's ahead of you"
❌ "You missed your window"
❌ "Starting now is embarrassing"

Reality:
✅ Most overnight successes took 10 years
✅ Experience compounds faster than youth
✅ Late starters have clearer purpose

I switched to deep tech at 34
Started leading teams at 37
Built my practice at 38

Each "late" start taught me this:

𝗣𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝘀 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗰𝗿𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝗻 𝗮 𝘀𝘂𝗶𝘁

THE SCIENCE OF LATE BLOOMERS:

Research shows late starters:
• Make better decisions (less ego)
• Build stronger networks (more genuine)
• Create sustainable success (less burnout)

They've already failed at things
They know what doesn't work
They waste less time on BS

Here's what nobody tells you:

Starting in your 40s means you skip the stupid mistakes
Starting on Friday means you beat Monday's competition
Starting at 5pm means you're working while they're drinking
Starting late means you know exactly why you're starting

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago
The second best time is while everyone's waiting for January

Your timeline isn't broken
Society's expectations are

💬 What did you start "too late" that changed everything?

♻️ Share with someone who needs permission to begin

➕ Follow Stephen Baines for psychology that challenges the timeline myth
... and grab my free newsletter too https://lnkd.in/ejtfPG9J

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